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Self-Inflicted Isolation Part 4 A couple of days after the Christmas party we met for dinner and I was surprised to see he was armed with a beautiful bouquet of flower’s, he had never brought me flowers before. We talked about the months we had been apart, how he and a friend had gone into a partnership and brought a bar in Thailand. I explained to him again that I had rejected his proposal as I was simply not ready to take on the role of stepmother to his from his previous relationship, nor was I ready to move so far away from my family and friends, nor was I ready to become a wife. I accepted all the above was down to my own immaturity, and I apologised for not making this as clear back then as maybe I thought I had. Anyway that one dinner led to another and another, as we slipped back to being a couple. Only this time it was different. This time, There where times when he seemed to be keeping me at arms length, which I found irritating but begrudgingly accepted as I was the one that had walked away previously. There were times when he would smell of stale booze but I never saw him drink and didn’t want to be a nag. Then there were the times when he wasn’t around at all, like a lot of my birthdays or the death of my grandad, these where the times when he had to go to Thailand to sort out some crisis at the bar. My anger at him not being round was retorted by his reasoning that he had a lot of money invested in the bar and he had to make it work. Then there were the times when his jealous rages drove me to tears over things I hadn’t even contemplated doing let alone actually done, which he promptly smoothed over by admission of his own insecurity’s. Then there were other times when he would be loving and romantic, telling me things would work out and even buying more flowers. As he told me the things I wanted to hear my anger dissolved and took the shape of guilt, as I was made to realise how selfish and unreasonable I was being. Just when your done deluding yourself that things cant get any worse, they nearly always do. 
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1/28/2008 5:52 am |
I admire your writing skills and your objective view to write your very personal story, although it is a sad one. That pint symbolizes his problem? Please continue     Dreams will come true
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2/4/2008 7:25 am |
I admire your writing skills and your objective view to write your very personal story, although it is a sad one. That pint symbolizes his problem? Please continue Sorry for not replying to you sooner,not had a chance to check out my blog for a few days. Yes the picture does to some degree symbolize what I believed to be the problem,but I guess I will never really know for sure. Thanks again for your compliments on my writing,Its helping me a lot as I am finding it very therapeutic in a strange sort of way. Take care and best wishes T & F
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2/4/2008 7:27 am |
Hi Mr funindetroit, My apologies to you also for not replying sooner, but thank you for taking the time to read and comment on my blog, your compliments are much appreciated. Take care T & F
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2/8/2008 12:09 am |
衷心地祝福大家新年快乐，万事如意！ I look forward to reading more of your BLOG in the new year. Visit my blog when you have time and join my conversation. May you find your special someone this year to bring you happiness. 域多利
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2/8/2008 12:20 pm |
衷心地祝福大家新年快乐，万事如意！ I look forward to reading more of your BLOG in the new year. Visit my blog when you have time and join my conversation. May you find your special someone this year to bring you happiness. 域多利 Its been a pleasure to have you comment on my blog and I look forward to talking with you more over the coming months,may this year bring you peace and happiness. Best Wishes T & F
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