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 | Blogs > Azn_HI_Girl > AZN'S BLOGS.... > WHAT WOULD YOU DO? |
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7/11/2008 12:00 am |
The only right thing to do is let that person know that he have done wrong against you.'Cause if you do it the opposite way,he might make revenge and your life will be in a risky situation.There are some people who will never accept any wrongdoings done by them.
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5/15/2008 7:27 pm |
Quoting Kamaaina ... "getting even acomplishes nothing... letting it pass is tacit aproval to do it again letting someone else do the dirty work undermines you let them know what they have done wrong earns respect for you andi it also allows you to respect for your self by facing the situation there is no other choice..." I agree wholehartedly with this viewpoint, however to apply this principle forgiveness must be added into it. Let's say that whatever it is may or may no be entirely evil, but certainly totally out of line. Without knowing the entire situation we have only to assume that this terrible act completely disrupted your life and your childrens lives. For whatever reason it is in the past, you just can't live in the past and have a successful, fullfilled, and satisfactory life. NOW -The only way to put that incident back in the past where it belongs is with forgiveness. Once in the past you can address the conversation that must take place with the person in question, such that a clearing is created and you can move into that clearing and regenerate your life anew. Consider that forgiveness is not for the other person it is for your own healing. Just as touch213 said that person must atone for their own mistakes whatever they may be. Your reality is to take care of yourself and your immediate family needs. COMPLETELY UNDERSTOOD! THANKS! 
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5/14/2008 2:56 am |
Dear AZN I voted "let them know what they have done wrong". As Wotracer points out "you just can't live in the past and have a successful, fullfilled, and satisfactory life", the earlier you walk out of the past, the sooner you will bounce back and start your life all over. Take care of yourself and kids. Love Mud I AM DESPERATELY TRYING TO GET OUT OF MY PAST BUT OUR STATE'S COURT SYSTEM WONT ALLOW JUST YET. ALL THE LEGAL STUFF I AM CURRENTLY GOING THRU AT THE MOMENT WON'T ALLOW ME TO MOVE FORWARD JUST YET. BEEN IN AND OUT OF COURT BATTLING OUR DIFFERENCES IS TAKING FOREVER, BUT HOPEFULLY IT WILL BE OVER SOON SO THAT I CAN MOVE FORWARD IN THIS NEW CHAPTER IN MY LIFE AND BE COMPLETELY SATISFIED. THANKS, SIS AND YOU BE GOOD!  ALOHA, AZN HAWAII GIRL
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5/13/2008 10:27 pm |
Dear AZN I voted "let them know what they have done wrong". As Wotracer points out "you just can't live in the past and have a successful, fullfilled, and satisfactory life", the earlier you walk out of the past, the sooner you will bounce back and start your life all over. Take care of yourself and kids. Love Mud
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 5/10/2008 9:56 pm |
Quoting Kamaaina ... "getting even acomplishes nothing... letting it pass is tacit aproval to do it again letting someone else do the dirty work undermines you let them know what they have done wrong earns respect for you andi it also allows you to respect for your self by facing the situation there is no other choice..." I agree wholehartedly with this viewpoint, however to apply this principle forgiveness must be added into it. Let's say that whatever it is may or may no be entirely evil, but certainly totally out of line. Without knowing the entire situation we have only to assume that this terrible act completely disrupted your life and your childrens lives. For whatever reason it is in the past, you just can't live in the past and have a successful, fullfilled, and satisfactory life. NOW -The only way to put that incident back in the past where it belongs is with forgiveness. Once in the past you can address the conversation that must take place with the person in question, such that a clearing is created and you can move into that clearing and regenerate your life anew. Consider that forgiveness is not for the other person it is for your own healing. Just as touch213 said that person must atone for their own mistakes whatever they may be. Your reality is to take care of yourself and your immediate family needs.
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5/9/2008 9:43 pm |
I did not meet my wife on line, but i have made some good friends on line and some of them have married people they met on Asia FriendFinder or skype. So, hang in there , it can happen for you as it has happened for others. Best of luck to you. SORRY, MY BAD...TOUGHT IT WAS YOU WHO MET YOUR WIFE ONLINE...OOOPS!  THANKS FOR YOUR BLESSING...I DO WANT TO MARRY MY ONLINE MATE. HE IS LIKE A POT OF GOLD TO ME!  TAKE CARE, GOD BLESS AND ALL THE BEST TO YOU. ALOHA, AZN HAWAII GIRL 
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5/9/2008 8:05 pm |
THANKS FOR SHARING YOUR POSITIVE VIEWS. I WILL TRY TO FORGIVE MYSELF, WHICH WILL BE A HARD THING TO DO, BUT FIRST, I MUST ASK FORGIVENESS FROM GOD... I HAVE NOT FORGOTTEN YOU. IN FACT, WASN'T IT YOU WHO MET YOUR WIFE ONLINE? I THINK THAT IS WHAT INSPIRED ME TO DO THE SAME AND TO CONTINUE TO BE ROMANTICALLY INVOLVED WITH MY ONLINE MATE, EVEN THOUGH WE ARE MILES APART. I BELIEVE SOME DAY WE WILL BE TOGETHER (FOREVER), BUT I WISH IT WERE SOONER THAN LATER... TAKE CARE...
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5/8/2008 11:29 pm |
people would love for you to cave in to being appeasing and driven by some prove whelming drive to beg for them assocciation.. but they have displayed they are not worthy of it.. You win, by moving on... and avoiding them and their ignorance.. they will find their own trials and tribulations.. and they must atone themselves... people resent happy people, and people reset other that try to make their lives work and build a positive enviornment... and the more positive it becomes, the more assaults that will come.. but knowing such.. is .. listen to your inner self, that self which instinctively considers other's motives and intentions, and listen to it and steer clear of it.. when it's time to help.. be equally as discerning, because at times those you may seek to help will at times become your biggest detriment...in their drives to undermine you and bring you down out of positivity into their negativity.. I've been dealing with it since I moved here, I could very well have survived until retirement payments come in, but spending and helping others who seek to do nothing but use, beg and borrow and take help for granted.. have been a re-learned lesson that I will not get in the situation to re-learn again at my expense.. so now I have to find employment and go outside of my path to be able to get back on, and travel my path.. But .. it's my fault for trying to lift them up, when their lives have shown they evidentially like the struggle of being down.. because they take and waste everything, and whine about what they don't have... so.. my view is .. if they don't have it, they won't get it, unless they get it for themselves... so just know, your children look to you, so let not others disrupt what you know is your main focus and your base of care. PLEASE BE ASSURED THAT YOU WILL BE BLESSED TEN TIMES MORE FOR HELPING OTHERS FROM THE KINDNESS OF YOUR HEART. EVEN THOUGH YOU MAY HAVE HAD TO SWALLOW YOUR PRIDE AND LOST LOTS, GOD WILL BLESS YOU ABUNDANTLY, AND IT WILL HAPPEN WHEN YOU LEAST EXPECT IT. GETTING BACK TO ME AND THE SUBJECT OF MY CONCERN. IT WAS WRONG FOR ME TO HAVE BEEN WRONGFULLY ARRESTED BY MY EXX WRONG FOR HIM TO CLAIM THAT I AM A CHILD ABUSER AND GETS ME KICKED OUT OF MY HOME, NEVER TO SEE OR HEAR MY YOUNG KIDS FOR 2 WEEKS, WRONG FOR HIM TO SEXUALY ASSAULT ME TIME AND TIME AGAIN, AND SO WRONG FOR MY EX-BEST GIRL FRIEND TO BACK HIM UP AND LIE ON THE WITNESS STAND ABOUT ME...AND ALL THE WHILE CLAIMING TO BE "MY" FRIEND, BUT INSTEAD, WAS PROBABLY SCREWING MY EX BEHIND MY BACK. THIS SITUATION IS CURRENTLY GOING ON IN MY LIFE AT THE MOMENT, THAT'S WHAT MAKES IT SO TOUGH FOR ME TO FOLLOW THROUGH WITH SOME OF LIFE'S EXPECTATIONS, BUT I DO IT FOR MY KIDS AND WITH THE HELP OF MY ONLINE MATE, WHO LIVES THOUSANDS OF MILES AWAY, BUT HAS BEEN THERE FOR ME FROM DAY ONE. WITH OUT HIM, I WOULD NOT BE HERE TODAY. I AM AND HAVE ALWAYS BEEN READY TO MOVE ON AND LEAVE THE PAST BEHIND ME, BUT I CANNOT DO IT ALONE. THERE IS SO MUCH TO BE DONE IN MY CASE YET, THAT IT GETS OVER-WHELMING. IMAGINE THE PUBLIC HUMILIATION I FELT WHEN I GOT FALSELY ARRESTED FOR SOMETHING I DID NOT DO. MY CHARGES HAVE BEEN DISMISSED BY THE PROSECUTORS BECAUSE THEY KNOW VERY WELL THAT I WAS SET UP SO TO SPEAK. THE HURT THESE TWO PEOPLE HAVE CAUSED ME IS UNFORGIVABLE, BUT I MUST LEARN TO FOGIVE AND MOVE ON, OTHERWISE, I WILL BE STUCK HER FOREVER. I MUST APPLAUD MYSELF AT LEAST FOR BEING GOOD ABOUT IT ALL, AS I HAVE DONE NOTHING TO "RETALIATE", WHICH I THINK ANYONE WOULD UNDERSTAND IF I DID. I AM NOT THAT KIND OF PERSON. I MAY "THINK" ABOUT WANTING TO DO SOMETHING TO GET BACK AND GET EVEN, BUT I DON'T HAVE IT IN MY HEART TO HURT ANYONE, EVEN THOUGH I AM THE ONE WHO SUFFERS FROM THIS TRAUMATIC ORDEAL. MY QUOTE: "TREAT EVERY DAY AS IF IT'S YOUR LAST DAY...LIVE EVERY DAY TO THE FULLEST POTENTIAL BECAUSE YOU NEVER KNOW WHEN YOUR DAY WILL COME. I WANT TO DIE WITH A SMILE ON MY FACE!" THANKS FOR SHARING YOUR DEEP, LONG THOUGHTS WITH ME AND THE VIEWERS. SOME MAY WONDER HOW I CAN POST DEEP, PERSONAL ISSUES ABOUT MYSELF HERE, BUT IT IS A WAY I CAN EXPRESS MYSELF AND WHY SHOULD I BE ASHAMED OF WHAT HAPPENED TO ME WHEN I HAVE DONE NOTHING WRONG? I WANT TO LEARN FROM MY EXPERIENCES AND HOPE TO LEARN FROM OTHERS' EXPERIENCES TOO, SO THANKS FOR SHARING YOUR STORY.
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5/8/2008 11:12 pm |
I also have struggled with forgiving my self...many things are easier said than done...but ..we just keep pushing forward. Nice to see you again too.....it's nice to be remembered. I HAVE NOT FORGOTTEN YOU. IN FACT, WASN'T IT YOU WHO MET YOUR WIFE ONLINE? I THINK THAT IS WHAT INSPIRED ME TO DO THE SAME AND TO CONTINUE TO BE ROMANTICALLY INVOLVED WITH MY ONLINE MATE, EVEN THOUGH WE ARE MILES APART. I BELIEVE SOME DAY WE WILL BE TOGETHER (FOREVER), BUT I WISH IT WERE SOONER THAN LATER... TAKE CARE...
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5/8/2008 1:03 pm |
people would love for you to cave in to being appeasing and driven by some prove whelming drive to beg for them assocciation.. but they have displayed they are not worthy of it.. You win, by moving on... and avoiding them and their ignorance.. they will find their own trials and tribulations.. and they must atone themselves... people resent happy people, and people reset other that try to make their lives work and build a positive enviornment... and the more positive it becomes, the more assaults that will come.. but knowing such.. is .. listen to your inner self, that self which instinctively considers other's motives and intentions, and listen to it and steer clear of it.. when it's time to help.. be equally as discerning, because at times those you may seek to help will at times become your biggest detriment...in their drives to undermine you and bring you down out of positivity into their negativity.. I've been dealing with it since I moved here, I could very well have survived until retirement payments come in, but spending and helping others who seek to do nothing but use, beg and borrow and take help for granted.. have been a re-learned lesson that I will not get in the situation to re-learn again at my expense.. so now I have to find employment and go outside of my path to be able to get back on, and travel my path.. But .. it's my fault for trying to lift them up, when their lives have shown they evidentially like the struggle of being down.. because they take and waste everything, and whine about what they don't have... so.. my view is .. if they don't have it, they won't get it, unless they get it for themselves... so just know, your children look to you, so let not others disrupt what you know is your main focus and your base of care.
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5/8/2008 9:31 am |
JAZZ~ LTNS! IT'S NICE TO SEE YOU AGAIN. I REMEMBER SOMEONE ONCE TOLD ME TO FORGIVE, BUT DON'T FORGET...AND KILL THEM WITH KINDNESS. IT'S SO EASY TO TELL ONE TO FORGIVE. IT'S NOT VERY EASY, BUT AS A CHIRISTIAN, I AM STILL LEARNING TO "LET GO AND LET GOD" AND "LOVE THY NEIGHBOR (JUST DON'T GET CAUGHT)  THAT WAS JUST A JOKE, JAZZ! INDEED, LEARNING TO FORGIVE MYSELF IS THE ONE OF THE HARDEST, AS I HAVE SO MANY REGRETS, BUT THERE'S NO TURNING BACK NOW. JUST GOT TO DO THE BEST I POSSIBLY CAN TO GET BY. IT HELPS TO HAVE FRIENDS TO KEEP REMINDING ME TO DO SUCH ACTS OF KINDNESS AND I WILL BE DEEPLY BLESSED AS WELL AS MAKE ME A BETTER PERSON. MAHALO FOR SHARING, JAZZ. TAKE CARE AND GOD'S BLESSING'S SHINE UPON YOU AND THE MRS... ALOHA... Nice to see you again too.....it's nice to be remembered.
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5/8/2008 3:52 am |
i would just let them know they did something wrong. now we can't push our opinion to people. if they feel sorry for it then its ok. if they don't give a heck then just forget about it and move on. just be careful with those kind of people. anyway, their karma would do the justice for you. if you won't let go of it, its you who's going to suffer more in the end. THANKS FOR POSTING YOUR COMMENT AND WELCOME TO AFF! I HOPE YOU ENJOY YOUR EXPERIENCE HERE AND FIND MANY FRIENDS LIKE I HAVE.
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5/8/2008 3:47 am |
I find that people who do such thing, you really don't have to do anything... they have emptied the integrity out of themselves on the floor.. and they will stay away from you on their own, because every time they see you.. it will remind them how much of a low life they are.. if you encounter them.. you don't have to be rude, but you can certainly have "NO time for them".. and let the lack of interest in them convey what ever you need it to convey.... and they will fade away... now if they are billigerent, then you tell them point blank.. to get the hell on.... !!! but don't get into a spat with them, all they will do is dump out a bunch of reasons, they hope you buy, as excuses. I THINK I KNOW WHAT YOU MEAN AND I THINK THESE TWO "PUNKS" ARE FEELING THE HURT AS MUCH AS I DO. I HAVE BEEN IGNORING THESE IGNORANT JERKS AND TOTALLY "IGGY" THEM. I'M SURE THAT HURTS THEM WHEN THEY SEE ME SMILING AND "ACTING" HAPPY AS IF IT DOESN'T BOTHER OR HURT ME. WHAT THEY DID TO ME WAS UNCALLED FOR AND IS IN NO WAY ACCEPTABLE BY ME. MY EX AND MY EX-BEST FRIEND, THEY DESERVE EACH OTHER AND HOPE THEY WILL PAY FOR WHAT THEY HAVE DONE TO ME AND MY KIDS...THAT'S ALL I WANT, IS FOR THEM TO SUFFER TEN TIMES MORE THAN WHAT THEY PUT ME THROUGH. I AM NOT DOING ANYTHING OR GOING OUT OF MY WAY TO SEE TO IT THAT THEY PAY FOR WHAT THEY DID, BUT I AM ONLY PROTECTING MYSELF AND MY KIDS.
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5/8/2008 3:35 am |
SG, you make a very good point. If you don't forgive it is harder for you to forget, or at least not be distracted by it. It's better for you to forgive, it puts the troubled situation off your mind. And sometimes we have to forgive ourselves. I think you should let the person know what they did offended you, then do your best to forgive them. LTNS! IT'S NICE TO SEE YOU AGAIN. I REMEMBER SOMEONE ONCE TOLD ME TO FORGIVE, BUT DON'T FORGET...AND KILL THEM WITH KINDNESS. IT'S SO EASY TO TELL ONE TO FORGIVE. IT'S NOT VERY EASY, BUT AS A CHIRISTIAN, I AM STILL LEARNING TO "LET GO AND LET GOD" AND "LOVE THY NEIGHBOR (JUST DON'T GET CAUGHT) THAT WAS JUST A JOKE, JAZZ! INDEED, LEARNING TO FORGIVE MYSELF IS THE ONE OF THE HARDEST, AS I HAVE SO MANY REGRETS, BUT THERE'S NO TURNING BACK NOW. JUST GOT TO DO THE BEST I POSSIBLY CAN TO GET BY. IT HELPS TO HAVE FRIENDS TO KEEP REMINDING ME TO DO SUCH ACTS OF KINDNESS AND I WILL BE DEEPLY BLESSED AS WELL AS MAKE ME A BETTER PERSON. MAHALO FOR SHARING, JAZZ. TAKE CARE AND GOD'S BLESSING'S SHINE UPON YOU AND THE MRS... ALOHA...
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5/8/2008 3:25 am |
getting even acomplishes nothing... letting it pass is tacit aproval to do it again letting someone else do the dirty work undermines you let them know what they have done wrong earns respect for you andi it also allows you to respect for your self by facing the situation there is no other choice... THANKS FOR YOUR FRIENDLY ADVICE...I NEEDED ASSURANCE TO KNOW I WAS DOING THE RIGHT THING! ALOHA...
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5/8/2008 3:23 am |
Now this is a very difficult decision. No many will think of forgive someone after the scare they left to you. But again...you have to forgive and smile. Brave the problem otherwise you will not forget it all your life. How can you find happiness if you keep thinking of revenge. And you know hiring someone to do a dirty job only to say you are no different from the culprit himself. Why get even with this person. You are not as low as he is. You have heart and you dont need to get even. Because when you forgive this person...they pain he feel will be more then you. Why tell them their mistake? Do you think they dont know what they had done? No....they know what they had done. It make them feel good to see you cry, suffered and feeling the pain they inflict to you. There is no point in explaining. The only way to explain to them is to be strong yourself. This will weak them and make them realised their mistake. So forget all that happened. Move on Kaikaina. Or you will lost all you have in the end. FRIENDS LIKE YOU MAKE ME A STRONGER PERSON! XIE XIE!  ALOHA NO KA KO'U
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5/7/2008 10:05 pm |
i would just let them know they did something wrong. now we can't push our opinion to people. if they feel sorry for it then its ok. if they don't give a heck then just forget about it and move on. just be careful with those kind of people. anyway, their karma would do the justice for you. if you won't let go of it, its you who's going to suffer more in the end.
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5/7/2008 11:38 am |
I find that people who do such thing, you really don't have to do anything... they have emptied the integrity out of themselves on the floor.. and they will stay away from you on their own, because every time they see you.. it will remind them how much of a low life they are.. if you encounter them.. you don't have to be rude, but you can certainly have "NO time for them".. and let the lack of interest in them convey what ever you need it to convey.... and they will fade away... now if they are billigerent, then you tell them point blank.. to get the hell on.... !!! but don't get into a spat with them, all they will do is dump out a bunch of reasons, they hope you buy, as excuses.
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5/7/2008 9:29 am |
Now this is a very difficult decision. No many will think of forgive someone after the scare they left to you. But again...you have to forgive and smile. Brave the problem otherwise you will not forget it all your life. How can you find happiness if you keep thinking of revenge. And you know hiring someone to do a dirty job only to say you are no different from the culprit himself. Why get even with this person. You are not as low as he is. You have heart and you dont need to get even. Because when you forgive this person...they pain he feel will be more then you. Why tell them their mistake? Do you think they dont know what they had done? No....they know what they had done. It make them feel good to see you cry, suffered and feeling the pain they inflict to you. There is no point in explaining. The only way to explain to them is to be strong yourself. This will weak them and make them realised their mistake. So forget all that happened. Move on Kaikaina. Or you will lost all you have in the end. If you don't forgive it is harder for you to forget, or at least not be distracted by it. It's better for you to forgive, it puts the troubled situation off your mind. And sometimes we have to forgive ourselves. I think you should let the person know what they did offended you, then do your best to forgive them.
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 5/7/2008 12:45 am |
getting even acomplishes nothing... letting it pass is tacit aproval to do it again letting someone else do the dirty work undermines you let them know what they have done wrong earns respect for you andi it also allows you to respect for your self by facing the situation there is no other choice...
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5/6/2008 8:50 pm |
Now this is a very difficult decision. No many will think of forgive someone after the scare they left to you. But again...you have to forgive and smile. Brave the problem otherwise you will not forget it all your life. How can you find happiness if you keep thinking of revenge. And you know hiring someone to do a dirty job only to say you are no different from the culprit himself. Why get even with this person. You are not as low as he is. You have heart and you dont need to get even. Because when you forgive this person...they pain he feel will be more then you. Why tell them their mistake? Do you think they dont know what they had done? No....they know what they had done. It make them feel good to see you cry, suffered and feeling the pain they inflict to you. There is no point in explaining. The only way to explain to them is to be strong yourself. This will weak them and make them realised their mistake. So forget all that happened. Move on Kaikaina. Or you will lost all you have in the end. *****Don't cry because it's over. Smile because it happened*****
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