|
|
YALL WILL LIKE THIS ONE IT'S SHORT...
you know that light travals faster than sound. This is why
some people seem bright until they speak.
here is another one. Some people are like slinkies... they're
really good for ... |
0 |
3 |
0 |
0.00 |
10/3/2009 4:02 pm |
|
|
AM I UGLY?
OK I WANT TO KNOW WHAT PEOPLE THINK OF ME. I'VE WRITTEN
SOME ARTICLES AND I HAVE MY PICTURE UP, SOOOO WATCHA THINK?
AM I UGLY 1 BEING YES AND 10 BEING HELL ... |
1 |
6 |
1 |
2.40 |
10/2/2009 2:26 pm |
|
|
What do Women Look For ? What do men look For?
Women Look for: Fast car Lots of money Perfect Hair Nice teeth Jokes in perfect amount Serious in perfect amount Able to ride horse. (white horse) Has own suit of amor Able to make romantic se only ... |
1 |
11 |
0 |
0.00 |
3/14/2009 10:10 am |
|
|
Definitions of Asians
The following is a list of important "slang"
defintions. I hope you enjoy the read.
Twinkie - Besides your nationality, there is little to distinguish
you from white people - Your ... |
2 |
85 |
7 |
2.79 |
12/12/2008 6:19 am |
|
|
Strict parents and smoking
"I had strict parents growing up, " comments
comedian Judah Friedlander, "especially my dad.
When I was 10, I got caught smoking with my friend Larry.
My dad busted us! So, to teach me a lesson, he ... |
0 |
17 |
0 |
0.00 |
12/12/2008 6:16 am |
|
|
Et cetera
Judah Friedlander once told a crowd:
I hate reading, but I love the word "et cetera."
You see it in writing a lot. But I like to use it in conversations
just to be a jerk! The look ... |
0 |
4 |
0 |
0.00 |
12/12/2008 6:14 am |
|
|
Let's here it for family values
A little boy comes home from school and tells his daddy that
his homework that night is to find out the difference between
"potentially" and "realistically."
"Easy, " says the boy's daddy. ... |
2 |
31 |
5 |
2.49 |
12/12/2008 6:12 am |
|
|
This is why friends don't let friends walk drunk
A nun wearing a full black habit is walking past a bar when
a drunk stumbles out, sees her, and punches her in the face.
Before she can even utter a scream, he lands a solid jab and
finishes her off ... |
1 |
23 |
2 |
3.81 |
12/12/2008 6:10 am |
|
|
Enoughs enough
When does tenacity turn into denial.
Its good to be tenacious its bad to be living in denial
When a girl says "not interested" is she really
not interested?Playing hard to get? or ... |
0 |
6 |
0 |
0.00 |
12/4/2008 10:13 pm |
|
|
TV vs Cellphone
Wife is like TV, girlfriend is like Cellphone
At home watch TV, go out bring Cellphone.
Sometimes enjoy TV, but most of the time play with Cellphone.
TV free for life but ... |
0 |
48 |
5 |
5.10 |
10/5/2008 8:26 pm |
|
|
Opposites Atract!
"You and your husband don't seem to have an awful
lot in common, " said the new tenant's neighbor.
"Why on earth did you get married?"
"I suppose it was the old business of 'opposites ... |
1 |
42 |
0 |
0.00 |
8/28/2008 11:45 pm |
|
|
The Popular Girl
In her own eyes, Tori was the most popular girl around. "A
lot of men are gonna be totally miserable when I marry.",
she said.
"Really?" asked her date, "And just how
many men are you ... |
0 |
39 |
1 |
2.40 |
8/28/2008 11:43 pm |
|
|
Husband and Wife
The Wife is in bed reading a book when the Husband walks in
carring a Sheep under his arm. The Husband says: "Honey, this is the pig I been sleeping
with." The Wife says: "That's not a pig, that's
a ... |
0 |
34 |
4 |
3.63 |
8/12/2008 1:31 pm |
|
|
The Stud
Albert, a Kentucky farmer, got in his pickup and drove to
a neighboring farm and knocked at the farmhouse door.
The oldest son of the owner of the farm answered the door.....
"Is ... |
0 |
38 |
1 |
2.40 |
7/7/2008 12:48 am |
|
|
A Sad Little Story...
There once was a happy little fly buzzing around a barn one
day, when she happened upon a large pile of fresh cow manure.
Since it had been hours since her last meal and she was feeling
hunger pains, ... |
0 |
35 |
0 |
0.00 |
7/7/2008 12:36 am |
|
|
Only a Southerner Knows
Only a Southerner knows the difference between a hissie
fit and a conniption fit, and that you don't "have"
them, you "PITCH" them.
Only a Southerner knows how many fish, collard greens, ... |
1 |
42 |
3 |
2.94 |
7/2/2008 12:37 am |
|
|
A few quick ones
1. Losing all your friends Man comes home, finds his wife with his friend in bed. He
shoots his friend and kills him. Wife says 'If you behave like
this, you will lose ALL your friends.' ... |
0 |
27 |
0 |
0.00 |
6/29/2008 6:22 am |
|
|
Shopping
Husband and wife are shopping in Tesco's when the man
picks up a crate of Stella and sticks them into the trolley
'What do you think you're doing?' asks the
wife 'They're on offer, only £10 for 24 ... |
0 |
31 |
0 |
0.00 |
6/22/2008 6:59 pm |
|
|
My first blog experience
I have little practice online here online, I stumbled on
to this site by a link, while looking for housing, planning
my retirement. Thought what a great idea, I mean I don't
know anyone in Australia. ... |
0 |
12 |
0 |
0.00 |
6/16/2008 2:39 am |
|
|
Blonde Jokes Can be Dangerous
After a really good party a man walks into a bar and orders
a drink. Already drunk and delirious, the man turns to the
person sitting next to him and says, "You wanna hear
a blonde joke?"
... |
1 |
47 |
0 |
0.00 |
6/8/2008 6:39 am |
|
|
Who is married to Lisa
... |
4 |
47 |
1 |
2.40 |
5/24/2008 4:31 pm |
|
|
The Therapist
A husband and wife came for counseling after 20 years of
marriage. When asked what the problem was, the wife went
into a passionate, painful tirade listing every problem
they had ever had in the 20 ... |
0 |
24 |
1 |
2.40 |
5/17/2008 1:16 am |
|
|
Relating the Pope to KFC?
A salesman from KFC walked up to the Pope and offers him a
million dollars if he would change "The Lord's
Prayer" from "give us this day our daily bread"
to "give us this day our daily chicken." The ... |
0 |
39 |
1 |
1.10 |
5/9/2008 4:30 am |
|
|
Relationship Humor
What is the best joke you ever heard about ... |
0 |
16 |
0 |
0.00 |
4/19/2008 2:14 pm |
|
|
What is your most interesting AFF experience ?
Anybody got any unusual or interesting happenings since
you've been on here, and/or in your travels accordingly
?
I've been here about 8 months or so, and really don't
have any, other than ... |
0 |
16 |
0 |
0.00 |
4/11/2008 2:59 pm |
|
|
Top 10 Things Men Know About Women
Top 10 Things Men Know About Women:
10.
9.
8.
7.
6.
5.
4.
3.
2. 1. They have ... |
1 |
53 |
4 |
2.86 |
3/26/2008 6:06 pm |
|
|
Ten Peeves that Dogs Have About Humans
1. Blaming your farts on me.... Not funny... Not
funny at all !!! 2. Yelling at me for barking. I'M A FRIGGIN'
DOG, YOU IDIOT! 3. Taking me for a walk, then not letting me check ... |
1 |
33 |
1 |
2.40 |
3/21/2008 6:16 am |
|
|
A Teary Goodbye!
Little Nancy was in the garden filling in a hole when her
neighbor peered over the fence. Interested in what the
little girl was up to, he politely asked, "What are
you up to there, Nancy?"
... |
0 |
70 |
1 |
2.40 |
3/13/2008 11:45 pm |
|
|
Love
LOVE, n .* man's grand delusion that one woman differs
from another;
* a sea of emotions entirely surrounded by expenses;
* what Plato described as "a grave mental disease"; ... |
0 |
16 |
1 |
5.00 |
3/11/2008 1:22 pm |
|
|
3 rings
There are 3 rings in a marriage:
1st there is the engagement ring
next there is the wedding ring
and last of all,
There is the sufferring ...  
... |
0 |
14 |
0 |
0.00 |
2/23/2008 7:11 am |
|
|
AsiaFriendFinder
AsiaFriendFinder is one of the popular online sites for
friendship and dating ... |
0 |
8 |
0 |
0.00 |
2/15/2008 3:06 am |
|
|
What kind of car are you?
Three women were talking about their love lives.
The first said, "My husband is like a Rolls-Royce;
smooth and sophisticated."
The second said, "Mine is like a porsche; fast and ... |
0 |
19 |
1 |
5.00 |
2/2/2008 3:43 pm |
|
|
The Fiancee...
A young woman brings home her fiancée to meet her parents.
After dinner, her mother tells her father to find out about
the young man. The father invites the fiancée to his study
for a drink. ... |
0 |
33 |
2 |
3.81 |
1/24/2008 12:28 pm |
|
|
Penance
I dreamt last night that I went to Heaven, and I met St. Peter
at the Pearly Gates. I asked him that since I just arrived
in Heaven, could I take a look around the place. St. Peter
agreed, and even ... |
0 |
59 |
1 |
5.00 |
1/11/2008 9:06 pm |
MrStan, 45 M
12/31/2007 10:31 pm
74
Articles,
Score
0.0
|
|
Kids at the Wedding
At a friend's wedding, everything went smoothly
until it was time for the flower girl and her young escort
to come down the aisle.
The boy stopped at every pew, growling at the ... |
0 |
35 |
0 |
0.00 |
12/31/2007 10:31 pm |
MrStan, 45 M
12/31/2007 10:30 pm
74
Articles,
Score
0.0
|
|
Problems from the start
John got off the elevator on the 50th floor and nervously
knocked on his blind date's door. She opened it and
was as beautiful and charming as everyone had said.
"I'll be ready in a few ... |
0 |
30 |
1 |
0.00 |
12/31/2007 10:30 pm |
MrStan, 45 M
12/31/2007 10:28 pm
74
Articles,
Score
0.0
|
|
Common wedding questions and answers
Q: Is it all right to bring a date to the wedding?
A: Not if you are the groom.
Q: How many showers is the bride supposed to have? A: At least one within a week of the wedding. ... |
0 |
22 |
1 |
0.00 |
12/31/2007 10:28 pm |
MrStan, 45 M
12/31/2007 10:27 pm
74
Articles,
Score
0.0
|
|
Reception:
Remember to reserve the UAW hall far in advance,
and avoid Saturdays, since that's bingo night. It
is perfectly acceptable to ask guests to wipe their feet
before entering the hall. After all ... |
0 |
9 |
1 |
2.40 |
12/31/2007 10:27 pm |
MrStan, 45 M
12/31/2007 10:26 pm
74
Articles,
Score
0.0
|
|
The ceremony:
No matter how urgent the event, loaded weapons have no place
at the alter. At the point in the ceremony that says, "If
anybody has any reason why these two should no be joined
in holy matrimony..." ... |
0 |
7 |
0 |
0.00 |
12/31/2007 10:26 pm |
MrStan, 45 M
12/31/2007 10:24 pm
74
Articles,
Score
0.0
|
|
men fear marriage
An organization that makes men fear marriage The British had an organization that Americans are now
considering adopting.
It seems that in England, they had a men's club, Bachelors' ... |
0 |
14 |
0 |
0.00 |
12/31/2007 10:24 pm |
MrStan, 45 M
12/31/2007 10:23 pm
74
Articles,
Score
0.0
|
|
Don't take any chances
A person receives a telegram informing him about
his mother-in-law's death. It also enquires whether
she should be buried or burnt.
He replies, "Don't take chances. Burn the body
and ... |
0 |
14 |
1 |
2.40 |
12/31/2007 10:23 pm |
MrStan, 45 M
12/31/2007 10:22 pm
74
Articles,
Score
0.0
|
|
The tradition at weddings
A little boy, at a wedding looks at his mom and says,
"Mommy, why does the girl wear white?"
His mom replies, "The bride is in white because she's
happy and this is the happiest day ... |
0 |
22 |
0 |
0.00 |
12/31/2007 10:22 pm |
MrStan, 45 M
12/31/2007 10:21 pm
74
Articles,
Score
0.0
|
|
Getting revenge with marriage
Old Farmer Johnson was dying. The family was standing
around his bed. With a low voice he sad to his wife: "When
I'm dead I want you to marry farmer Jones."
Wife: "No, I can't marry ... |
0 |
20 |
0 |
0.00 |
12/31/2007 10:21 pm |
MrStan, 45 M
12/31/2007 10:20 pm
74
Articles,
Score
0.0
|
|
Going crazy with confusion
A psychiatrist visited a California mental institution
and asked a patient, "How did you get here? What was
the nature of your illness?" He got the following
reply.
"Well, it all started ... |
1 |
46 |
4 |
3.25 |
12/31/2007 10:20 pm |
MrStan, 45 M
12/31/2007 10:19 pm
74
Articles,
Score
0.0
|
|
A very desperate marriage
A man really loved a woman, but he was just too shy to propose
to her. Now he was up in his years and neither of them had ever
been married. Of course, they dated about once a week for
the past six ... |
2 |
58 |
3 |
3.43 |
12/31/2007 10:19 pm |
MrStan, 45 M
12/31/2007 10:18 pm
74
Articles,
Score
0.0
|
|
Married life
Married life is full of excitement and frustration: * In the first year of marriage, the man speaks and the woman
listens. * In the second year, the woman speaks and the man listens.
* In the third ... |
1 |
39 |
6 |
2.80 |
12/31/2007 10:18 pm |
MrStan, 45 M
12/31/2007 10:16 pm
74
Articles,
Score
0.0
|
|
Marriage is not a word.
Marriage is not a word. It is a sentence--a life sentence.
Marriage is very much like a violin; after the sweet music
is over, the strings are attached.
Marriage is love. Love is ... |
1 |
31 |
6 |
3.08 |
12/31/2007 10:16 pm |
|
|
Little Johnny Gets An Eyeful!
A young female teacher was giving an assignment to her sixth
grade class one day. It was a large assignment so she started
writing high up on the chalkboard. Suddenly, there ... |
3 |
60 |
9 |
3.85 |
12/13/2007 8:26 am |
|
|
Pubic Grass?!
A nurse was on duty in the Emergency Room, when
a young woman with purple hair styled into a punk rocker Mohawk, sporting
a variety of tattoos, and wearing strange clothing, entered. ... |
4 |
64 |
10 |
3.98 |
12/8/2007 3:14 am |
|
|
Sex During Breakfast!
An elderly woman goes to the doctor and
asks his help to revive her husband's sex drive.
"What about trying Viagra?" asks the doctor.
"Not a chance" says Mrs. ... |
3 |
84 |
10 |
3.98 |
12/8/2007 2:38 am |
|
|
hmm
ye its a ... |
1 |
26 |
3 |
0.49 |
11/26/2007 4:05 pm |
|
|
Grandma's Boyfriend
One day, a five-year-old boy went to visit his grandmother.
He was playing with his toys in her bedroom while grandma
was dusting, and he looked up and said, "Grandma,
how come you don't have a ... |
3 |
87 |
7 |
2.28 |
11/15/2007 4:40 am |
|
|
The Chinese restaurant owner
A single Chinese man owns a Chinese restaurant,
and one day a beautiful Chinese woman walks in. He immediately
walks over and asks her out on a date. She agrees. They go
out for a while, and ... |
1 |
92 |
7 |
3.30 |
10/25/2007 7:20 pm |
|
|
Who is the boss...
I think I am, she thinks she is. I say yes, she says no. I say red, she says blue.
So who is the boss?
I imagine we both let the other think they are the boss.
... |
0 |
15 |
3 |
2.94 |
10/22/2007 8:19 am |
|
|
millionaire
A woman was telling her friend, "It is me who made
my husband a millionaire, "
"And what was he before you married him?asked her
friend
The woman replied, " A ... |
0 |
45 |
3 |
3.92 |
10/17/2007 7:29 pm |
|
|
Honeymoon
the newly married couple returned fromtheir honeymoon.as
they got off the plane at the crowded airport, the bride
said, Darling, let's make the people think we've
been married a long time"
... |
3 |
61 |
6 |
5.07 |
10/14/2007 9:11 pm |
|
|
Husband and wife
Married life changes over time.In the first year of marriage, the
man speaks and the wife listens.In the second year, the
woman speaks and the man listens.In the third year, they
both speak and the ... |
0 |
28 |
4 |
3.63 |
10/14/2007 8:59 pm |
|
|
Marriage
Marriage is very much like a violin, after the sweet music
is over, the strings are still ... |
0 |
21 |
3 |
3.43 |
10/14/2007 8:56 pm |
|
|
Marriage
When a man holds a woman"s hand before marriage, it
is love:after marriage, it is self ... |
2 |
37 |
4 |
5.19 |
10/14/2007 8:54 pm |
|
|
~~~ WAYS TO TURN DOWN UNWANTED MEN ~~~
WAYS TO TURN DOWN UNWANTED MEN !!!!
Have fun reading!
HE : Can I buy you a drink? SHE : Actually I'd rather have the money.
HE : I'm a photographer. I've been looking for
a ... |
6 |
81 |
12 |
3.68 |
9/27/2007 1:17 am |
pixi3, 36 F
9/19/2007 2:16 am
1
Article,
Score
0.0
|
|
Stepmothers
Jennifer's wedding day was fast approaching. Nothing
could dampen her excitement -- not even her parent's
nasty divorce. Her mother had found the PERFECT dress to
wear and would be the best dressed ... |
2 |
53 |
5 |
2.49 |
9/19/2007 2:16 am |
|
|
A guy was trying to console a friend
A guy was trying to console a friend who'd just
found his wife in bed with another man. "Get over it, buddy, " he said. "It's
not the end of the world."
"It's all right for you to ... |
2 |
66 |
3 |
3.92 |
9/17/2007 3:26 am |
|
|
Warning Labels
If government is going to put health warning labels on beer,
wine and liquor, let's at least have a little truthfulness
about the matter!
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol ... |
1 |
49 |
2 |
3.81 |
9/17/2007 2:47 am |
|
|
What is the difference?
What is the difference between a pregnant woman
and a light bulb?
You can unscrew a light bulb!... |
1 |
29 |
1 |
2.40 |
9/17/2007 2:42 am |
|
|
Confession
A woman takes a lover home during the day while her husband
is at work. Her 9-year old son comes home unexpectedly, sees them, and
hides in the bedroom cupboard to watch. The woman's husband also ... |
7 |
92 |
10 |
4.98 |
9/10/2007 7:16 pm |
|
|
Its perfect!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Once upon a time, a perfect man and a perfect woman met. After
a perfect courtship, they had a perfect ... |
2 |
31 |
5 |
3.80 |
8/28/2007 10:24 pm |
|
|
Find out what may really mean when men say...
"I'M GOING FISHING" Means: "I'm going to drink myself dangerously
stupid, and stand by a stream with a stick in my hand, while
the fish swim by in complete safety."
"IT'S A GUY THING" Means: ... |
0 |
9 |
1 |
2.40 |
8/28/2007 10:20 pm |
|
|
AT THE SUPERMARKET
A young man was walking through a supermarket to pick up
a few things when he noticed an old lady following him around.
Thinking nothing of it, he ignored her and continued on.
Finally he ... |
7 |
120 |
17 |
3.27 |
8/28/2007 6:16 am |
|
|
My daughter is your reward
Once there was a millionaire, who collected live alligators.
He kept them in the pool in back of his mansion. The millionaire
also had a beautiful daughter who was single. One day he
decides to throw ... |
2 |
34 |
3 |
3.43 |
8/26/2007 9:52 am |
|
|
Bad start to a date
John got off the elevator on the 50th floor and nervously
knocked on his blind date's door. She opened it and
was as beautiful and charming as everyone had said.
"I'll be ready in a few ... |
0 |
13 |
1 |
1.10 |
8/26/2007 9:50 am |
|
|
The guide to wife translations
The wife says: You want The wife means: You want
The wife says: We need The wife means: I want
The wife says: It's your decision The wife means: The correct decision should be ... |
1 |
14 |
2 |
2.42 |
8/26/2007 9:46 am |
|
|
The Good, The Bad & The Ugly
THE GOOD, THE BAD & THE UGLY
Good : Your wife is pregnant. Bad : It's triplets. Ugly : You had a vasectomy five years ago.
Good ... |
4 |
46 |
4 |
4.80 |
8/25/2007 10:23 am |
|
|
The Burned Ears
A guy burned two ears... so they were asking him at the hospital
how it happened.
He said, ''I was ironing my clothing and the phone
rang... So, instead of the phone I picked up the iron ...
|
9 |
84 |
4 |
4.80 |
8/21/2007 11:09 pm |
|
|
Perfumed Blonde
Why does a blonde put perfume on her ankles? Because
it ends up behind her ears anyway!... |
7 |
61 |
13 |
3.81 |
8/21/2007 11:06 pm |
|
|
Stupid Men Quiz...
How does a man make sex more interesting?
Puts a bag over his head
Moves to the next Room
Leaves town
[COLOR ... |
0 |
16 |
0 |
0.00 |
8/5/2007 5:27 pm |
|
|
Takes children to knock some sense in adult...
I was reading some article today and suddenly it remind
me of an incident whch happen to my friend's students
who were only 5 year olds. Kids are very naive and sometimes
they give us answer that is ... |
1 |
24 |
3 |
1.47 |
7/30/2007 9:44 am |
|
|
Salary this month ...100 Kisses....
Husband Letter to Wife
Dear Sweetheart:
I can’t send my salary this month, so I am sending 100 kisses.
You are my sweetheart.
Your husband Allen….
His ... |
1 |
60 |
3 |
2.94 |
7/18/2007 11:42 am |
|
|
Lawyer's Joke
The lawyer's son wanted to follow in his father's
footsteps, so he went to law school. He graduated with honors,
and then went home to join his father's firm. At the end of his first day at work he ... |
1 |
63 |
1 |
1.10 |
7/18/2007 10:55 am |
|
|
Children's Dad
A husband and wife had four boys. The odd part of it was that
the older three had red hair, light skin and were tall, while
the youngest son had black hair, dark eyes and was short.
The ... |
1 |
35 |
0 |
0.00 |
7/17/2007 12:01 pm |
|
|
Replace Husband
A wife went to the police station with her next-door neighbor
to report that her husband was missing. The policeman asked
for a description.
She said, "He's 35 years old, 6 foot 4, has dark ... |
1 |
43 |
1 |
2.40 |
7/17/2007 11:56 am |
|
|
She's So Blonde
She's so blonde she spent an hour looking at a can of
orange juice because it said ... |
6 |
96 |
8 |
3.71 |
7/14/2007 5:29 pm |
|
|
Flower Bribes
One Friday, two women were sitting and talking. One woman
looked up and saw her husband coming down the street with
a bunch of flowers in his hand. She rolled her eyes and said, “There comes the ... |
3 |
65 |
5 |
4.77 |
7/14/2007 5:24 pm |
|
|
Summertime Activities
Yes, it is almost summertime! The fun time of the year with
lots to do outside and especially on the beach.
This is where a funny situation can develop.
In resort towns in the ... |
1 |
23 |
3 |
4.41 |
4/28/2007 2:15 am |
|
|
How did we Meet :-)
The first person I met online was so interesting to my frieds.
They asked questions of what web site I used and what did
I say that peeked her intrest. I was asked by one aquantice.. No really what ... |
0 |
38 |
4 |
0.92 |
4/3/2007 9:53 pm |
|
|
Three Dogs Talk
Three dogs are in the waiting room of a vets office.
The first dog asked the second dog "What are you here
for?"
"I crap and pee all over the house so I'm going
to be put to sleep. What ... |
4 |
123 |
18 |
4.76 |
3/29/2007 4:16 pm |
|
|
Funny Tongue Twisters
These funny tongue twisters are difficult to say
and may be a little dirty if you say them wrong.
I slit the sheet - the sheet I slit - and on the slitted sheet
I sit.
Try ... |
2 |
40 |
7 |
4.31 |
3/29/2007 4:14 pm |
|
|
Doctor Bob
Doctor Bob had \bsexo?\b with one of his patients
and had felt guilty all day long.
No matter how much he tried to forget about it, he couldn't.
The guilt and sense of betrayal was ... |
1 |
51 |
13 |
4.49 |
3/29/2007 4:12 pm |
|
|
First Time Cussers
A 6-year-old and a 4-year-old are upstairs in their
bedroom. "You know what?" says the 6-year-old.
"I think it's about time we start cussing."
The 4-year-old nods his head in approval. The ... |
0 |
42 |
8 |
4.41 |
3/29/2007 4:05 pm |
Jalo05, 40 F
3/27/2007 7:52 am
4
Articles,
Score
0.0
|
|
BETWEENS
Women's body are so sensitive and they easily get tickled
everywhere.
They said that between finger toes of a woman is the most
sensitive and their weakness.
Q: Where in between finger ... |
21 |
196 |
55 |
2.17 |
3/27/2007 7:52 am |
|
|
Tough Riddle
.
. . A || B C D BH WH BH WH
. Prisoners: A, B, C and D BH: Black Hat WH: White Hat ||: Wall
So...you have four men who were all sentenced to ... |
5 |
52 |
5 |
3.80 |
3/26/2007 12:37 pm |
|
|
Riddle
Question: If a bullfrog jumped over a beanpie...how many roses would
bloom
...
|
1 |
26 |
2 |
3.81 |
3/26/2007 11:51 am |
|
|
Computer Gender
A Spanish teacher was explaining to her class that in Spanish,
unlike English, nouns are designated as either masculine
or feminine.
"House" for instance, is feminine: "la
casa."
"Pencil, " ... |
1 |
42 |
6 |
4.50 |
3/25/2007 4:38 pm |
|
|
Does love last forever?
Quick question, does love last forever once couple gets
married?
... |
4 |
59 |
4 |
2.08 |
3/25/2007 4:34 pm |
KQRBNP, 45 F
3/25/2007 10:04 am
6
Articles,
Score
0.0
|
|
Sick Day
Chow calls into work and says, "Hey, I no come work today - I sick, headache, stomach
ache, legs hurt, I no come work."
The boss says, "You know something, Chow, I really need you today. ... |
2 |
72 |
11 |
3.92 |
3/25/2007 10:04 am |
KQRBNP, 45 F
3/23/2007 3:18 am
6
Articles,
Score
0.0
|
|
Just a Silly Memo......
Computer company memo:
This supposedly was a real memo sent out by a computer company
to its employees in all seriousness. It went to all field
engineers about a computer peripheral problem. The ... |
2 |
42 |
3 |
4.41 |
3/23/2007 3:18 am |
|
|
The Hawaiian vs. The Missionary
A Caucasian missionary is out hunting for ducks one day
in the mountain on the Big Island of Hawai'i. He hears
a noise coming from behind some bushes. Suddenly a boar
comes storming out and runs past ... |
2 |
138 |
22 |
3.73 |
3/13/2007 10:31 pm |
|
|
Travel
Robert Johnson had been retired for a year when
his wife of fifty years suggested one day, "Why don't
we take a cruise for a week and make wild passionate love
like we did when we were ... |
19 |
235 |
29 |
3.74 |
3/9/2007 6:08 pm |
|
|
Speaking Part
One afternoon, Christopher's
father picked him up early from school to take Chris to a
dental appointment.
Knowing that the parts for the school play were supposed
to be ... |
2 |
45 |
6 |
2.51 |
3/9/2007 6:07 pm |
|
|
Switched!!!
A guy wanted to buy a gift for his new girlfriend's
birthday. As they had only started dating, after careful
consideration, he decided a pair of gloves would strike
the right note: personal, ... |
5 |
72 |
12 |
3.51 |
3/9/2007 6:05 pm |
|
|
Ouch!!!!
A fellow decides to take off
early from work and go drinking. He stays until the bar loses
at 2am, at which time he is extremely drunk. When he enters
his house, he doesn't ... |
6 |
178 |
16 |
4.74 |
3/9/2007 6:02 pm |
|
|
All dolled up
A couple was going out for the evening. They had
gotten ready, all dolled up, cat put out, etc. The taxi arrived,
and as the couple walked out the door, the cat shot back in.
They didn't want ... |
0 |
22 |
3 |
5.39 |
3/9/2007 5:59 pm |
|
|
Three sisters
Three sisters decided to get married on the same day to save
their parents the expense of separate weddings. As a further
step to reduce the price tag, the three sisters resolved
to spend their ... |
9 |
140 |
33 |
1.77 |
3/9/2007 5:57 pm |
|
|
The Grill
A husband and his wife who have been married twenty
years were doing some yard work. The man was working hard
cleaning the BBQ grill while his wife was bending over,
weeding flowers from the ... |
4 |
77 |
13 |
3.98 |
3/9/2007 5:53 pm |
|
|
the crow and the fox
Master Crow perched on a tree, Holding a cheese inside of his beak. Master Fox, attracted by the smell Said something like this : "Hello there, good day Mister Crow ! How lovely you are ! how ... |
0 |
22 |
7 |
1.26 |
2/26/2007 5:31 am |
|
|
Differences
The Italian says, "When I've a finished a makina
da love withah my wife, I go down and gently tickle the back
of her knees, she floats 6 inches abova da bed in ecstasy."
The Frenchman replies. ... |
10 |
449 |
59 |
3.10 |
2/22/2007 11:36 am |
|
|
Consumer letter
Dear Tide:
I am writing to say what an excellent product you have! I've
used it all of my married life, as my Mom always told me it
was the best. Now that I am in my fifties I find it even ... |
2 |
85 |
8 |
3.71 |
2/22/2007 11:07 am |
|
|
Little bits
A couple is lying in bed. The man says, "I am going to
make you the happiest woman in the world." The woman
replies, "I'll miss you..."
He said - Shall we try swapping positions tonight? She ... |
1 |
88 |
6 |
4.22 |
2/22/2007 10:36 am |
|
|
Words Women Use
WORDS WOMEN USE
1.) FINE: This is the word women use to end an argument
when they are right and you need to shut up. 2.) FIVE MINUTES: If she is ... |
10 |
286 |
41 |
5.67 |
2/22/2007 9:59 am |
|
|
If is sounds too good to be true...
You may of heard of the expression warning,
"if it sounds too good to be true,
it probably is." I am here to say that this
is true with relationships! If you think
I am being paranoid, best of ... |
0 |
27 |
2 |
5.20 |
2/14/2007 5:26 pm |
Jalo05, 40 F
2/6/2007 10:44 pm
4
Articles,
Score
0.0
|
|
Jumbo sausage please
A Japanese man married to an American woman who can never
speak Japanese language. Let' name her Cynthia!
Cynthia wants to impress her husband by cooking his favorite
food. But when she ... |
6 |
167 |
24 |
1.65 |
2/6/2007 10:44 pm |
|
|
Humour is important
In my Opinion, Humour is the most important Thing in a relationship
(besides Honesty).
If you can laugh together, you can live tohether.
The best thing is when you Girlfriend is your best friend ... |
2 |
42 |
12 |
2.62 |
1/28/2007 12:15 pm |
|
|
Woman - A Chemical analysis
Element: Woman
Symbol: Wo
Discoverer: Adam
Atomic Mass: Accepted at 53.6Kg, but known to vary from
40-200Kg.
Occurrences: Copious quantities in all urban areas. ... |
0 |
18 |
0 |
0.00 |
1/24/2007 12:21 am |
|
|
Man - A Chemical analysis
Element: Man
Symbol: Ma
Quantitative: Accepted at 7 inches though some isotopes
can be as short as 4 inches.
Discoverer: Eve (discovered by accident one day when
she had a ... |
0 |
21 |
2 |
4.50 |
1/24/2007 12:15 am |
|
|
The Brain Market
A man went to the doctor's. The doctor came in and said,
"well, I've got some good news and some bad news.
The bad news is that you have an inoperable brain tumor.
The good news is our hospital ... |
2 |
107 |
18 |
2.99 |
1/23/2007 11:39 pm |
|
|
Only In America
I really do love this country, but...
1. Only in America... can a pizza get to your house faster
than an ambulance.
2. Only in America... are there handicap parking places
in ... |
2 |
58 |
9 |
4.92 |
1/23/2007 9:21 pm |
|
|
Best Things to say if Caught Sleeping At Your Desk...
"They told me at the blood bank this might happen."
"This is just a 15 minute power-nap as described in
that time management course you sent me."
"Whew! Guess I left the top ... |
0 |
13 |
2 |
3.12 |
1/23/2007 9:19 pm |
|
|
Anticipation is Everything
Walking up to a department store's fabric counter,
a pretty girl asked, "I want to buy this material for
a new dress. How much does it cost?"
"Only one kiss per yard, " replied the ... |
1 |
38 |
5 |
3.14 |
1/23/2007 5:43 pm |
|
|
Understanding Women
A Woman's Vocabulary, Keywords and Meanings
(from a woman's point of view)
FINE
This is the word we use at the end of any argument in which
we feel we are right, but need to shut you ... |
0 |
16 |
3 |
1.47 |
1/23/2007 5:08 pm |
|
|
Meet You in Heaven
After a long illness, a woman died and arrived at the Gates
of Heaven. While she was waiting for Saint Peter to greet
her, she peeked through the Gates. She saw a beautiful banquet
table. Sitting ... |
1 |
36 |
4 |
2.08 |
1/23/2007 4:27 pm |
|
|
How To Make Women Happy...The Point System
In the world of romance, one single rule applies: Make the
woman happy. Do something she likes and you get points.
Do something she dislikes and points are subtracted. You
don't get any points for ... |
0 |
28 |
2 |
5.20 |
1/23/2007 3:32 pm |
|
|
Politically Correct Ways to Describe Men's Faults
He does not have a BEER GUT.
He has developed a LIQUID GRAIN STORAGE FACILITY.
He is not a BAD DANCER.
He is OVERLY CAUCASIAN.
He does not GET LOST ALL THE TIME.
He ... |
2 |
20 |
5 |
3.47 |
1/23/2007 3:10 pm |
|
|
What Would Be Different If Men Really Ruled the World
Any fake phone number a girl gave you would automatically
forward your call to her real number.
Nodding and looking at your watch would be deemed an acceptable
response to "I love you." ...
|
0 |
16 |
2 |
4.50 |
1/23/2007 1:44 am |
|
|
MESSAGES FROM MEN TO WOMEN
1) If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't
ask us.
2) Learn to work the toilet seat: if it's up, put it down.
3) Don't cut your hair. Ever.
4) Birthdays, ... |
1 |
49 |
14 |
3.78 |
12/27/2006 6:18 pm |
|
|
50 OBSERVATIONS ABOUT WOMEN
1.Women love to shop. It is the one area of the world where
they feel like they're actually in control.
2.Women especially love a bargain. The question of "need"
is irrelevant, so don't ... |
0 |
25 |
7 |
3.80 |
12/27/2006 6:15 pm |
|
|
My Rules
Typical macho man married typical good-looking lady and
after the wedding, he laid down the following rules:
"I'll be home when I want, if I want and at what
time I want-and I don't ... |
0 |
28 |
3 |
2.45 |
12/27/2006 1:16 pm |
|
|
Male assertiveness
A mild-mannered man was tired of being bossed around by
his wife so he went to a psychiatrist.
The psychiatrist said he needed to build his self-esteem,
and so gave him a book on ... |
4 |
76 |
12 |
3.86 |
12/27/2006 1:15 pm |
|
|
Money Talks!
During the wedding rehearsal, the groom approached the
pastor with an unusual offer:
"Look, I'll give you $100 if you'll change
the wedding vows. When you get to the part where I'm ... |
3 |
88 |
12 |
3.86 |
12/27/2006 1:14 pm |
|
|
searching for the perfect man
Situation:2 Freundine im Cafe, die eine Freundin will
der Single-Freundin ein Mann vorstellen.Freundin A=Single
und Freundin B=Verkuplerin
Freundin A mit Anfang 20
B:Süße ich habe da ... |
0 |
11 |
3 |
2.45 |
12/26/2006 5:09 am |
|
|
Who can help?
A potato farmer was sent to prison just
at the time when he should have been digging the ground for
planting the new crop of potatoes. He knew that his wife
would not be strong ... |
21 |
531 |
131 |
3.75 |
12/22/2006 9:15 am |
|
|
The old car Joke
One day there's a couple wife and husband, they riding
the old car for going to the City,
mean while in the middle on the road the wife said with her
husband
" Pap LOOk at the road Quick ! ... |
3 |
59 |
8 |
1.16 |
12/21/2006 11:15 am |
|
|
RELATIONSHIP HUMOR and/or JOKES you may ask
I would just like to make a comment
to anyone concerned, I have noticed just a few people
now and then have taken some of my jokes in a serious fashion.
I never make ... |
3 |
82 |
13 |
2.98 |
12/13/2006 3:01 pm |
|
|
Oh, Those In-laws
There was a married couple who were
in a terrible accident. The woman's face was burned
severely. The doctor told the husband they couldn't
graft any skin from her body ... |
11 |
151 |
25 |
5.12 |
12/8/2006 5:03 pm |
|
|
Naughty Mrs. Clause
Cheesy Joke:
Q: What did Santa say when he caught Mrs. Claus in bed with
a couple of elves?
A: Ho Ho Ho
Please contact the joke ... |
3 |
51 |
9 |
4.07 |
12/8/2006 4:47 am |
|
|
CORPORATE MEMO
To: All Staff
Date: December 1
Subject: New "Twelve Days of Christmas" Policy
The recent announcement that Donner and Blitzen
have elected to take the ... |
2 |
50 |
5 |
3.80 |
12/7/2006 2:40 pm |
|
|
Love VS. Marriage
Love may be blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener.... |
5 |
122 |
30 |
3.24 |
11/28/2006 6:30 pm |
|
|
Confession
Confession is good for the soul,
but bad for your career.... |
4 |
85 |
14 |
2.50 |
11/28/2006 6:28 pm |
|
|
20 Years In Jail
A woman awoke during the night to find that her husband
was not in bed. She put on her robe and went downstairs.
He was sitting at the kitchen table with a cup of coffee in
front ... |
19 |
476 |
86 |
4.18 |
11/28/2006 6:15 pm |
|
|
The Horse Race
Horses Racing Today....
1. Passionate Lady
2. Bare Belly
3. Silk Panties
4. Conscience
5. Jockey Shorts
6. Clean Sheets
7. Smooth Thighs
8. Big ... |
0 |
60 |
5 |
3.14 |
11/28/2006 7:27 am |
|
|
Aliens.!!!
What's E.T. short for.?????
Cos he's only got little ... |
3 |
46 |
5 |
3.14 |
11/22/2006 5:58 am |
|
|
Indian Visits whore House
An Indian walks into a whore house and throws a bag of money
on the counter and says, "me want pussy."
The woman working the counter decides that she wants to
have a little fun with him, and ... |
1 |
149 |
3 |
1.47 |
11/16/2006 8:59 am |
|
|
DA LAZY WIFE
A young couple got married and left on their honeymoon.
When they got back, the bride immediately called her mother.
"Well, how was the honeymoon?" asked the mother.
"Oh mamma!" she exclaimed. ... |
4 |
98 |
24 |
2.79 |
11/13/2006 4:40 am |
|
|
Call for Supremacy
A lion woke up one morning feeling really rowdy and mean.
He went out and cornered a small monkey and roared,
"Who is mightiest of all jungle animals?"
The trembling monkey says, "You are, ... |
4 |
174 |
32 |
4.55 |
11/13/2006 4:28 am |
|
|
what is a sellfish people
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-..people who doest not think about ... |
1 |
34 |
4 |
0.14 |
11/12/2006 7:33 am |
|
|
Sunburned!
A guy falls asleep on the beach for several hours and gets
horrible sunburn. He goes to the hospital and is promptly
admitted after being diagnosed with second degree burns.
He was already ... |
3 |
102 |
17 |
3.13 |
11/9/2006 11:53 pm |
|
|
computers
Likewise, you can infect a computer with a destructive
virus by
simply typing "UPLOAD VIRUS." Viruses cause
temperatures in
computers, just like they do in humans. After a while, ... |
0 |
19 |
1 |
2.40 |
11/7/2006 10:10 pm |
|
|
The big game hunter.
The big game hunter walked in the bar and bragged to everyone
about his hunting skills.
The man was undoubtedly a good shot and no one could dispute
that.
But then he said ... |
2 |
66 |
6 |
4.22 |
11/5/2006 5:16 am |
|
|
The old lady and the bank president.
An elderly woman walked into the Bank of Canada one morning
with a purse full of money. She wanted to open a savings account
and insisted on talking to the president of the Bank because,
she said, ... |
4 |
72 |
13 |
3.14 |
11/5/2006 4:46 am |
|
|
The old lady and the bank president.
An elderly woman walked into the Bank of Canada one morning
with a purse full of money. She wanted to open a savings account
and insisted on talking to the president of the Bank because,
she said, ... |
1 |
38 |
4 |
4.02 |
11/5/2006 4:44 am |
|
|
The Diet
An extremely obese woman shows up at her doctor's office
crying and claims that she has tried every possible way
to lose weight, all to no avail. She continues to sob,
"My husband won't ... |
0 |
51 |
4 |
3.25 |
11/5/2006 4:15 am |
|
|
Abbott and Costello Discover Computers
You have to be old enough to remember Abbott and Costello,
and too old to REALLY understand computers, to fully appreciate
this. For those of us who sometimes get flustered by our
computers, ... |
0 |
22 |
4 |
4.41 |
11/5/2006 3:38 am |
|
|
Accountant Joke
THE CHICKEN FARMER
A woman walks into an accountant's office and tells
him that she needs to file her taxes. The accountant says,
"Before we begin, I'll need to ask you a few questions." ... |
0 |
52 |
5 |
3.47 |
10/29/2006 1:06 pm |
|
|
Let me apologize,
Let me apologize,
I am a hot headed egocentric fool much of the time acting
far to quickly in anger with far too little information..
I want to apologize to SP33DY2 for my insulting ... |
0 |
26 |
1 |
2.40 |
10/28/2006 11:53 pm |
|
|
A women uses 30,000 words per month
A statiscian was pulling up a statistic regarding how many
words men uses versus women on a monthly basis.
The poll showed that Men uses only 15, 000 words while the
women uses 30, 000 ... |
0 |
24 |
3 |
2.94 |
10/28/2006 3:20 pm |
|
|
Time it takes for Male and Female to decide chance of 2nd date
Statistically, it's been said by women that it takes
about 1 hour during the first date for a women to decide whether
there is an opportunity of a second date.
For men.
It takes them ... |
2 |
46 |
4 |
3.25 |
10/28/2006 3:16 pm |
|
|
This is crazy to me… And I am angry about it
This is crazy to me… And I am angry about it
There is a man on this site who posted 10 articles saying
nothing but “Hello I’m Here”. He has a new article out now
that says, “Maybe” and ... |
3 |
26 |
4 |
0.92 |
10/28/2006 1:27 pm |
|
|
en français
Un condamné à mort s'évade d'un pénitencier où
il était reclus depuis 15 ans. Dans sa fuite, il arrive près
d'une maison. Il y pénètre à la recherche d'argent
et d'armes. Il trouve un couple au ... |
0 |
2 |
0 |
0.00 |
10/27/2006 4:49 pm |
|
|
hello
i'm ... |
2 |
25 |
4 |
0.92 |
10/27/2006 4:02 pm |
|
|
Blonde jokes ...... OMG too funny!!!
BLONDE LOGIC
Two blondes living in Oklahoma were sitting on a bench talking........
and one blonde says to the other, "Which do you think
is farther away..........Florida or the moon?"
... |
5 |
65 |
21 |
1.76 |
10/25/2006 10:11 pm |
|
|
I won't sleep with you tonight!
A guy goes to a bar. At the other end he sees a pretty woman.
He is so shy that he need an hour gathering up his courage
to go over her and asks, "Would you mind if I chatted
with you?" She ... |
6 |
277 |
38 |
3.57 |
10/20/2006 11:24 am |
|
|
Relationship
A RELATIONSHIP that grows from
mutual Love and Respect, Kindness, Understanding and
Compassion is strong enough to last a lifetime.
-Knightmate
The Perfect ... |
0 |
21 |
3 |
3.43 |
10/19/2006 11:43 am |
|
|
Young Man At A Bar....Create Your Own Joke
There are several out there, so now is your chance to add
yours to the list. In time I'll finish the one I heard,
maybe you heard it too.
A young man was sitting at a bar by himself ... |
0 |
110 |
2 |
3.81 |
10/18/2006 7:13 pm |
|
|
The gift
A man asks his wife what she would like for her birthady.
Whould you like a diamond ?
No I don't need any more diamons.
Would you like a yacht ?
No I get sea sick.
How about I buy you a jet ... |
1 |
55 |
8 |
2.78 |
10/15/2006 5:06 am |
|
|
True Story
Hey, it is a cute one.
I recently went out with a beautiful Chinese woman of my
acquaintance, and after a few hours together, she really
began to relax around me.
I loved to ... |
2 |
77 |
9 |
2.78 |
10/14/2006 5:42 pm |
|
|
Husband vs. Wife
A husband and wife were married for years. They had very
competitive personalities, so they would always compete
in everything. It wouldn't matter what the competition
would be, simple or crude. ... |
0 |
37 |
3 |
2.94 |
10/14/2006 5:24 pm |
|
|
Faith Healing
An old couple, were sitting in their living room on a Sunday
morning watching a religious program. The preacher on
this show would go to all the people in the audience and asking
them what they ... |
0 |
17 |
4 |
5.19 |
10/12/2006 1:35 am |
|
|
Air Love
What can we do during a twenty-six hours flight ... |
1 |
36 |
2 |
1.04 |
10/7/2006 1:21 am |
|
|
The wicked wife
There was once a couple who had no children, the man was very
kind but the wife was very wicked.The man was a fisherman
and oneday as he was fishing he caught a fish which told him
to set it free ... |
4 |
109 |
16 |
1.95 |
10/3/2006 12:40 am |
|
|
Dogs letters to God
Dear God,
Why do humans smell the flowers, but seldom, if ever, smell
one another?
Dear God,
When we get to heaven, can we sit on your couch? Or is it the
same old story?
... |
0 |
33 |
4 |
1.30 |
9/30/2006 9:39 pm |
|
|
Classroom Quotes
TEACHER: George, go to the map and find North America.
STUDENT: Here it is!
TEACHER: Correct. Now class, who discovered America?
CLASS: George!!
TEACHER: Willy, name one important ... |
7 |
190 |
34 |
5.31 |
9/29/2006 9:56 pm |
|
|
Funniest Joke In The World
The Dad walks into his Sons room and says "Son, If I
told you once I told you a thousand times, don't do that
or you'll go blind". The Son says "Dad,
I'm over ... |
4 |
204 |
30 |
1.08 |
9/24/2006 1:29 pm |
|
|
When flirting becomes too personal !
What is the difference between flirting
and hitting on someone.
Flirting is like dancing around the subject.
Hitting is like stepping ... |
0 |
31 |
5 |
2.82 |
9/24/2006 10:45 am |
|
|
brass bed
During a "Doggie Style" session I drove my
ex wife's head between the bars of our brass
bed.After I finished i had to use vaseline on the bars to
get her head out.Of course she didn't see the ... |
1 |
43 |
4 |
0.92 |
9/24/2006 10:00 am |
|
|
here is a nasty bar drink
this is a true story but funny. me and a friend were in a bar
a couple of weeks ago and he wanted a shot of tequila. so the
bartender says to my friend take it like a man, and we say
what. then he ... |
3 |
75 |
4 |
2.47 |
9/24/2006 1:22 am |
|
|
cocktail Hour
A woman and her boyfriend are out having a few drinks. While
they're sitting there having a good time together
she starts talking about this really great new drink. The
more she talks about it, ... |
1 |
44 |
4 |
2.47 |
9/23/2006 4:21 pm |
|
|
The Angry Preacher
The preacher rose with a red face. "Someone in this
congregation has spread a rumor that I belong to the K.K.K.
This is a horrible lie! A God fearing decent Christian community
cannot tolerate ... |
0 |
32 |
5 |
3.47 |
9/21/2006 8:57 pm |
|
|
the way to love
if you love me :
Buy a house in China
Send money to my family
Live in your own house no rent
Give me salary to live with you
....
..Well ! Chinese ladies seems to be ... |
7 |
104 |
27 |
2.93 |
9/16/2006 11:53 am |
|
|
What use a camel to hide itself?
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
--a camel ... |
2 |
36 |
8 |
3.25 |
9/13/2006 10:20 am |
|
|
What has been your most embarssing date?
It think almost everyone has a story or two to tell about
something embarassing that has happened on a date. Here
is one of my all time embarassing moment during a date:
The guy I was ... |
2 |
81 |
15 |
3.74 |
9/12/2006 7:52 pm |
|
|
Where Is The Power..?
I met a female of my age grade in this site. She loved
to write me everyday... she makes my mood to change in writing.
Later I noticed that she has two profiles here, few days
later she ... |
4 |
58 |
9 |
2.78 |
9/9/2006 7:45 am |
|
|
I Really Fall In Love With Her
Many women profile are posted by proxy... for someone
to handle. Since few days i joined this site I've met
two interested gals here and we're writing each other
in English, although her ... |
6 |
92 |
32 |
1.64 |
9/3/2006 2:25 am |
|
|
How to understand some men!! Not me of course:)
1) "Can I help with dinner?"
Really means....
"Why isn't it already on the table?" 2) "Have you lost weight?"
Really means....
"I've just spent £400 on a bar football ... |
0 |
41 |
9 |
3.21 |
8/30/2006 1:39 am |
|
|
E-Mail from the Afterlife
An Illinois man left the snow-filled streets of Chicago
for a vacation in Florida,
his wife was on a business trip and was planning to meet him
there the next day.
When he reached ... |
0 |
36 |
8 |
5.33 |
8/22/2006 6:16 pm |
|
|
A Fathers Terror
Dear Dad:
It has now been three months since I left for college. I have
been
remiss in writing and am very sorry for my thoughtlessness
in not
... |
2 |
51 |
11 |
3.35 |
8/22/2006 6:13 pm |
|
|
Marriage fact's
Married life is full of excitement and frustration:
* In the first year of marriage, the man speaks and the woman
listens.
* In the second year, the woman ... |
0 |
29 |
2 |
3.12 |
8/22/2006 6:10 pm |
|
|
it's a mans world supervised by woman.
"It's a man's world but it is supervised
by a woman."
I heard someone say this today, ..in his view woman influence
so many things that men only think they are in control.
what ... |
1 |
24 |
3 |
2.45 |
8/22/2006 12:02 am |
|
|
Missing Beer!
A man walked into a bar and ordered a beer. He took a sip and
walked over to the jukebox to spin a record. When he returned
to his table he discovered that his beer was gone. He stopped
a ... |
2 |
77 |
15 |
2.37 |
8/19/2006 11:24 pm |
|
|
What's in a name?
A Indian boy goes to his mother one day with a puzzled look
on his face.
'Say Mom, why is my bigger brother named Mighty Storm'?
'Because he was conceived during a mighty storm',
she said.
... |
0 |
36 |
2 |
4.50 |
8/18/2006 10:49 pm |
|
|
What's in a name?
A Indian boy goes to his mother one day with a puzzled look
on his face.
'Say Mom, why is my bigger brother named Mighty Storm'?
'Because he was conceived during a mighty storm',
she said.
... |
0 |
13 |
2 |
3.81 |
8/18/2006 10:48 pm |
|
|
The Pirate
A pirate walked into a bar, with a very noticeable attribute:
there was a automobile's steering wheel protruding
from the crotch area of his pants. The bartender could not
help but comment, ... |
0 |
45 |
3 |
3.43 |
8/17/2006 9:30 pm |
|
|
Chinese Proverbs
Virginity like bubble, one prick, all gone.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Man who run in front of car get tired.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Man who run behind car get exhausted.
... |
0 |
45 |
3 |
3.43 |
8/16/2006 11:37 pm |
|
|
Women and Titties
Women with big tits ...
..can get a taxi on the worst days
..have men give them the best seats on a bus.
..have a neat place to carry spare change
..have ... |
1 |
54 |
6 |
2.23 |
8/16/2006 11:31 pm |
|
|
A quickie from my grandmother
A man asks his wife if she feels like going out that evening.
She replies, "Yes, but I'd like to go somewhere
really expensive."
The man, always trying to impress his wife, ... |
2 |
101 |
13 |
3.81 |
8/7/2006 1:39 pm |
|
|
saving up
a young, newly wed couple heads off to their honeymoon suite.
.. 5 minutes later, the bride calls up her mom, clearly frustrated
. "i thought he meant he saved up twenty years of ... |
0 |
78 |
2 |
2.42 |
8/7/2006 12:03 am |
|
|
Good Bars
A Scotsman, American, and an Irishman are in a bar. They
are having a good time and all agree that the bar is a nice
place.
Then the Scotsman says, 'Aye, this is a nice bar, but
where I ... |
1 |
66 |
9 |
4.71 |
8/4/2006 5:47 am |
|
|
The Tiger
A couple was on their honeymoon, lying in bed, about ready
to consummate their marriage, when the new bride says to
the husband, "I have a confession to make, I'm
not a virgin."
The ... |
1 |
146 |
5 |
3.14 |
8/4/2006 2:24 am |
|
|
Church Bells
On hearing that her elderly grandfather had just passed
away, Katie went straight to her grandparent's house
to visit her 95 year old grandmother and comfort her.
When she asked how her ... |
0 |
97 |
3 |
3.43 |
8/4/2006 2:21 am |
|
|
The Taxi Driver
A priest and a taxi driver both died and went to heaven. St.
Peter was at the Pearly gates waiting for them.
'Come with me', said St. Peter to the taxi driver.
The taxi ... |
0 |
98 |
3 |
2.45 |
8/4/2006 2:18 am |
|
|
101 Ways To Annoy People
1. Sing the Batman theme incessantly.
2. In the memo field of all your checks, write "for
sensual massage."
3. Specify that your drive-through order is "to go."
... |
3 |
111 |
4 |
2.47 |
8/4/2006 2:13 am |
|
|
Why Computers Sometimes Crash! by Dr. Seuss
( Read like a rhyme - kids loves it )
(You gotta read this one out loud)
I f a packet hits a pocket on a socket on a port, and the bus
is interrupted
At a very last resort, ... |
0 |
30 |
4 |
1.69 |
8/3/2006 6:10 am |
|
|
Double Takes
A man sits down at a bar and orders a double shot of whiskey.
He downs the shot and takes something out of his pocket to
look at briefly. After a minute, he calls the bartender
over and ... |
1 |
73 |
8 |
4.17 |
8/2/2006 12:01 pm |
|
|
The Confessional
An 80-year-old man went into the confessional and told
the priest the following: "Father, I am an 80-year-old
man, I'm married, I have four children and eleven grandchildren.
Last night I strayed ... |
0 |
42 |
2 |
1.73 |
8/2/2006 7:33 am |
|
|
Arriving home very drunk
A man is in a bar and falling off his stool every couple of
minutes. He is obviously drunk. So the bartender says to
another man in the bar: "Why don't you be a good
Samaritan and take him home." ...
|
0 |
95 |
5 |
3.80 |
8/1/2006 2:39 am |
|
|
Deathbed Confession
The was a man who had four kids, all gorgeous, except for
the youngest one, Craig, who was nothing short of gruesome.
While on his deathbed, the husband asked his wife, "Marie,
tell me one ... |
0 |
60 |
6 |
1.94 |
7/15/2006 5:09 am |
|
|
Who's the Boss?
A young couple on their wedding night were in their honeymoon
suite.
As they were undressing for bed, the husband, a big burly
man, tossed his trousers to his new bride. He said, "Here,
put ... |
5 |
111 |
12 |
5.80 |
7/15/2006 4:48 am |
|
|
sex therapy
Sex Therapy -
A Florida couple, both well into their 80s, go to a sex therapist's
office.
The doctor asks, "What can I do for you?" The man says, "Will you watch us have sexual intercourse?" ...
|
1 |
79 |
12 |
3.33 |
7/15/2006 4:37 am |
|
|
put off by humour?
humour is considered the universal language of the soul,
just as some consider music to be ..
but what about when humour puts you off ? such as an ill timed
joke about part of your ... |
0 |
18 |
2 |
0.34 |
7/14/2006 6:05 am |
|
|
Open Your Inside
Heart is a very sensitive part of human's internal
organ wheter it's inside or outside.literally heart
is a pumping organ that allow your bloody liquid to circulate
in your inside and fill your ... |
1 |
38 |
3 |
1.96 |
7/2/2006 11:41 am |
|
|
Open Your Inside
Heart is a very sensitive part of human's internal
organ wheter it's inside or outside.literally heart
is a pumping organ that allow your bloody liquid to circulate
in your inside and fill your ... |
0 |
11 |
3 |
0.98 |
7/2/2006 10:29 am |
ABI513, 55 M
6/29/2006 5:34 pm
5
Articles,
Score
0.0
|
|
Coffee Break
A man dies and goes straight to Hell. The Devil leads him
pasts lakes of fire, lava and the screams of millions of
condemned souls.
Finally after a long trek they arrive at an ocean of ... |
0 |
81 |
9 |
3.21 |
6/29/2006 5:34 pm |
ABI513, 55 M
6/29/2006 5:21 pm
5
Articles,
Score
0.0
|
|
Free Sex
A man observed a local Gas/petrol/Service Station had
a sign advertising FREE SEX !! STOP IN AND REGISTER TO WIN
!! Daily Winners !! The man finally decided to stop for fuel
one day and he ... |
0 |
109 |
14 |
3.14 |
6/29/2006 5:21 pm |
|
|
Don't Step on the Ducks
Three women die together in an accident and go to heaven.
When they get there, St. Peter says, "We only have
one rule here in heaven: don't step on the ducks!"
So they enter heaven, ... |
1 |
81 |
15 |
6.50 |
6/28/2006 7:16 pm |
ABI513, 55 M
6/26/2006 12:34 pm
5
Articles,
Score
0.0
|
|
Donkey & Onion
What do you get when you cross a Donkey and an Onion?
Answer: A piece of ass that brings tears to your ... |
1 |
70 |
9 |
5.14 |
6/26/2006 12:34 pm |
|
|
25 reasons why CHOCOLATE IZ BETTER THAN A MAN ;)
No idea if this was posted or not. Watever, smiliezzzzzzzzzzz
Chocolate is rich,
dark & satisfyin
... |
9 |
138 |
35 |
4.21 |
5/28/2006 7:57 pm |
|
|
Le computer? La computer?
Computers
A french teacher was explaining to her class that in French,
unlike English, nouns are designated as either masculine
or feminine... 'House' is feminine - 'la ... |
7 |
154 |
33 |
5.63 |
5/18/2006 10:21 am |
|
|
two English words
A young boy went up to his father and asked
"What's the difference between potentially
and realistically?"
The father ponders for a moment, then answered "Go
ask your ... |
2 |
115 |
17 |
3.55 |
5/18/2006 10:13 am |
|
|
What Communication Problems?
A husband and wife were at a party chatting with some friends
when the subject of marriage counseling came up. "Oh,
we'll never need that. My husband and I have a great
relationship, " the wife ... |
1 |
116 |
20 |
3.76 |
5/9/2006 10:39 pm |
|
|
The Wousy Bwind Date
Jesse took his blind date to the carnival. "What would
you like to do first, Amber?" asked Jesse. "I
want to get weighed, " replied Amber.
They ambled over to the weight guesser. He ... |
3 |
101 |
18 |
4.76 |
5/9/2006 10:36 pm |
|
|
A new couple
The couple has been married only two weeks. The husband,
although very much in love, can't wait to go out on the
town and party with his old buddies.
"Honey, " says he to his new bride, ... |
1 |
106 |
14 |
6.18 |
5/9/2006 10:20 am |
|
|
IT'S GOOD TO BE A WOMAN!!!
IT'S GOOD TO BE A WOMAN!!!
We got off the Titanic first.
We can scare male bosses with mysterious
gynecological disorder excuses.
Taxis stop for ... |
2 |
104 |
16 |
3.27 |
5/8/2006 6:17 am |
|
|
Angel Face & Devil Figure
Edna : Tom, you love my angel face or my devil figure?
Tom: ......I love your humor... |
0 |
228 |
7 |
3.55 |
5/5/2006 9:45 pm |
|
|
Riddles..!
Who settled in the West before anyone else?
"The Sun"
*********************************************
What goes from Malaysia to Singapore?
"The Road."
... |
2 |
65 |
5 |
1.84 |
4/30/2006 8:36 pm |
|
|
Some Great Cynical Answers to That Stupid Question: "Why aren't you married yet?"
You haven't asked yet.
-Because I just love hearing this question, quick, ask
me again!
-Just lucky, I guess.
-Trade in my miniskirt for a ... |
1 |
102 |
3 |
5.39 |
4/28/2006 1:12 pm |
|
|
Brains - Feminist Joke of the Millenium
BRAINS
In the hospital, the relatives gathered in the waiting
room, where their family member lay gravely ill. Finally,
the doctor came in looking tired and somber.
"I'm afraid ... |
1 |
58 |
1 |
5.00 |
4/27/2006 7:08 pm |
|
|
Math 101
What is the square root of 69? 8 ... |
0 |
91 |
3 |
3.43 |
4/25/2006 1:30 am |
|
|
SPELLING 101
WHY IS SEX SPELLED S-E-X? IT IS EASIER THAN TRYING TO SPELL, ... |
0 |
98 |
1 |
3.70 |
4/24/2006 9:17 am |
|
|
ALCOHOL RELATED
2 DRUNKS WERE WALKING DOWN SOME RAILROAD TRACKS."I
SURE WOULD LIKE TO GET OFF THIS STAIRWAY, " SAID ONE.
THE OTHER REPLIED, "I DON'T MIND THE STAIRS,
BUT THE HANDRAIL IS TO LOW."
... |
1 |
95 |
8 |
2.32 |
4/11/2006 4:35 pm |
|
|
WALKING INTO A BAR
1. A skeleton walks into a bar and says, "GIMME A BEER,
AND A MOP.' 2. A penguin walks into a bar and says, "ANYBODY
SEEN MY BROTHER?" The bartender replies, "WHAT
DOES HE LOOK LIKE?" ... |
1 |
152 |
16 |
1.95 |
4/11/2006 3:43 pm |
|
|
A very desperate marriage
A man really loved a woman, but he was just too shy to propose
to her. Now he was up in his years and neither of them had ever
been married. Of course, they dated about once a week for
the past ... |
2 |
99 |
8 |
3.94 |
4/11/2006 9:52 am |
|
|
Marriage is not a word. It is a sentence--a life sentence.
Marriage is very much like a violin; after the sweet music
is over, the strings are attached.
Marriage is love. Love is blind. Therefore, marriage is
an institution for the blind.
... |
11 |
175 |
39 |
4.21 |
4/11/2006 9:51 am |
|
|
Asking the Wizard of Oz
President Bush, Dan Quayle, Ross Perot, and Bill Clinton
all traveled together to see the Wizard of Oz. Upon arrival,
they were brought to see him.
First, President Bush went to see the ... |
3 |
98 |
7 |
4.31 |
4/11/2006 9:46 am |
|
|
JOKE TIME....
3 brothers named Bu, Chu and Fu migrated to USA from China.
They decided to change their name :
Bu became Buck
Chu became Chuck.
Fu decided to go back to China .
Man : I want ... |
2 |
94 |
7 |
4.31 |
4/9/2006 9:08 am |
|
|
THE PERFECT COUPLE ....
Once upon a time, a perfect man and a perfect woman met. After
a perfect courtship, they had a perfect wedding. Their
life together was, of course, perfect.
One snowy, stormy Christmas ... |
2 |
239 |
29 |
4.84 |
4/9/2006 9:03 am |
|
|
3 WISHES ....
Three friends were stranded on a desert island. After several
weeks with no food and no drinking water, they were beginning
to lose heart.
Suddenly, a bottle floated into the shore and ... |
1 |
73 |
2 |
3.12 |
4/9/2006 8:59 am |
|
|
MARRIAGE COUNSELING .....
After just a few years of marriage, filled with constant
arguments, a young man and his wife decided the only way
to save their marriage was to try counseling.
When they arrived at the ... |
1 |
65 |
5 |
2.49 |
4/9/2006 8:57 am |
|
|
THE WHOLE TRUTH....
At school, a boy is told by a classmate that most adults are
hiding at least one dark secret, and that this makes it very
easy to blackmail them by saying, "I know the whole
truth" even when you ... |
0 |
51 |
2 |
2.42 |
4/9/2006 8:56 am |
|
|
A DEFINITE DEFINITION ......
A teacher decides that she is going to teach her second grade
class a new word today. She tells them that the word is "definitely"
and its meaning is "absolute, positive, without
a doubt."
She ... |
0 |
40 |
3 |
3.43 |
4/9/2006 8:54 am |
|
|
SHOCKING LETTER .....
A mother enters her daughter's bedroom and sees a letter
on the wall over the bed. With the worst premonition, she
reads it, with trembling hands: It is with great regret
and sorrow that I'm ... |
0 |
46 |
1 |
2.40 |
4/9/2006 8:52 am |
|
|
ALWAYS THERE FOR ME....
This woman's husband had been slipping in and out of
a coma for several months, yet she had stayed by his bedside
every single day. One day, when he came to, he motioned for
her to come nearer.
... |
1 |
52 |
5 |
2.82 |
4/9/2006 8:50 am |
|
|
SPEEDY DIVORCE
A married couple are driving along a highway doing 60mph,
the wife behind the wheel. Her husband suddenly looks over
at her and says, "Honey, I know we've been married
for 20 years, but I want a ... |
1 |
55 |
1 |
2.40 |
4/9/2006 8:48 am |
|
|
FIRST AID
It was a stifling hot day and a man fainted in the middle of
a busy intersection. Traffic quickly piled up in all directions
while a woman rushed to help him. When she knelt down to loosen
his ... |
0 |
41 |
2 |
1.73 |
4/9/2006 8:43 am |
|
|
RELIEF FROM HOUSEWORK
The housewife answered the phone and listened with relief
to the voice in her ear. "How are you, dear? What kind
of day are you having?"
"Oh, Mom, the baby won't eat, the washing machine ... |
0 |
43 |
3 |
1.96 |
4/9/2006 8:41 am |
|
|
THEY DON'T TELL ME ANYTHING...
A sweet grandmother telephoned Makati Medical Hospital.
She timidly asked, "Is it possible to speak to someone
who can tell me how a patient is doing?"
The operator said "I'll be glad to ... |
1 |
59 |
3 |
2.45 |
4/9/2006 8:38 am |
|
|
CAT.....
This cat, is cat, a cat, good cat, way cat, to cat, keep cat,
an cat, idiot cat, busy cat, for cat, 20 cat, seconds cat
!... Now read it without the word cat [SIZE ... |
0 |
47 |
3 |
2.45 |
4/9/2006 8:36 am |
|
|
A Man and his Ostrich .....
A man walks into a restaurant with a full-grown
ostrich behind him.
The waitress asks for their orders.
The man says, "A hamburger, fries and a coke, "
and turns to the ... |
3 |
308 |
37 |
5.52 |
4/9/2006 8:23 am |
|
|
REDNECK ID 2
WHY IS IT SO HARD TO ID A DEAD REDNECK? THERE ARE NO DENTAL
RECORDS, AND EVERYBODY HAS THE SAME ... |
0 |
48 |
1 |
2.40 |
4/8/2006 2:02 am |
|
|
REDNECK ID
A POLICEMAN STOPPED A REDNECK, AND SAID "YOU GOT ANY
ID?" THE REDNECK REPLIED, "ABOUT ... |
3 |
68 |
3 |
3.43 |
4/8/2006 1:59 am |
|
|
First Date
How to prepare on a first date:
clear your shower from cobwebs and take shower.(I know
that Easter will be later).
If your friends seeing your in sokcs say:''wow!
Lend me this cool shoes!!!''. ...
|
0 |
60 |
1 |
2.40 |
4/4/2006 5:34 pm |
|
|
my joke
who should be on the marriage when marry
Hungarian with French?
a ... |
0 |
55 |
1 |
0.00 |
4/4/2006 8:14 am |
|
|
The difference between theory and reality.
A young boy needed help with his schoolwork, so he went to
his father."Dad, I have to explain the difference
between theory and reality for science class. Can you help
me?" The father replied, ... |
1 |
106 |
5 |
1.84 |
4/2/2006 3:03 pm |
|
|
A REAL EMERGENCY
A Doctor was working late in his office, when suddenly his
phone rang. It was a hysterical woman, who cried, "Doctor,
come quick! My little boy just swallowed a condom!"
The doctor threw on his ... |
0 |
55 |
3 |
2.45 |
3/30/2006 11:48 am |
|
|
Tis an Irish joke
An Irish man had just got a job at a construction site and
the boss gave him his first job to measure the hight of the
ladder.
So up he went with the tape measure but each time he went up
the ... |
0 |
47 |
3 |
2.45 |
3/27/2006 3:39 am |
|
|
Yo mama so fat, the whales sing
Yo mamma's so fat, when she went to the beach, the whales
sang "We are ... |
0 |
43 |
3 |
3.43 |
3/26/2006 8:39 am |
|
|
Social Security
A retired gentleman went to the social security office
to apply for Social Security.
The woman behind the counter asked him for his driver's
license to verify his age. He looked in his ... |
0 |
41 |
3 |
5.39 |
3/26/2006 8:34 am |
|
|
Encyclopaedia Britannica
Seen in my local paper's "readers sales"
section.
FOR SALE BY OWNER
Complete set of encyclopaedia Britannica.
45 Volumes. Excellent condition.
?000 pounds or best offer.
... |
0 |
32 |
3 |
4.41 |
3/26/2006 8:32 am |
|
|
Need Samples
An old man goes to the doctor for his yearly physical, his
wife tagging along. When the doctor enters the examination
room, he tells the old man, "I need a urine sample,
a stool sample and a sperm ... |
0 |
38 |
3 |
3.43 |
3/26/2006 8:30 am |
|
|
Poor guy
A man escapes from prison
where he has been for 15 years. He breaks into a house to look
for money and guns and finds a young couple in bed.
He orders the guy ... |
0 |
48 |
5 |
4.12 |
3/26/2006 7:52 am |
|
|
"Chinese Virgins"
A Chinese couple gets married. She's a virgin and,
truth be told, he is none too experienced either. On the
wedding night, she cowers naked under the bed sheets as
her husband undresses. He climbs ... |
0 |
75 |
6 |
1.94 |
3/25/2006 9:43 pm |
|
|
BAD GRADES
Little Billy returns home from school and says he got an
F in arithmetic.
Why?" asks the father."
The teacher asked, 'How much is two times three?'
I said six, " replied Billy.
... |
0 |
56 |
8 |
4.17 |
3/25/2006 12:51 am |
|
|
FRIENDSHIP
Friendship Between Women:
A woman didn't come home one night. The next day she
told her husband that she had slept over at a friend's
house. The man called his wife's 10 best friends. None ... |
0 |
58 |
5 |
5.75 |
3/25/2006 12:39 am |
|
|
NOTHING TO DECLARE
A very distinguished lady was on a plane arriving from Switzerland.
She found herself seated next to a nice priest whom she asked:
"Excuse me Father, could I ask a favour?"
"Of course my ... |
0 |
124 |
10 |
4.98 |
3/19/2006 2:09 am |
|
|
YIN YANG
A tourist was visiting a temple in Singapore when he noticed
two statues, a man and a woman by the altar.
He asked the monk what was the significance of the two.
The monk explained ... |
0 |
118 |
6 |
3.08 |
3/19/2006 2:00 am |
|
|
WARNING LABELS
"This product not intended for use as a dental drill."
- Found on an electric rotary tool.
"Caution: Do not spray in eyes." - Found on a
can of under-arm deodorant.
"Do not drive ... |
0 |
112 |
3 |
4.41 |
3/19/2006 1:52 am |
|
|
COW PRICE STRUCTURE
A farmer had been taken several times by the local car dealer.
One day, the car dealer informed the farmer that he was coming
over to purchase a cow.
The farmer priced his unit as follows: ... |
0 |
117 |
5 |
4.45 |
3/19/2006 1:49 am |
|
|
MEDICAL HUMOUR
Patient: It's been one month since my last visit and
I still feel miserable.
Doctor: Did you follow the instructions on the medicine
I gave you?
Patient: I sure did. The bottle ... |
0 |
123 |
4 |
4.80 |
3/19/2006 1:48 am |
|
|
Nude Gallery
Nude Gallery
A couple goes to an art gallery. They find a picture of a naked
women with only her privates covered with leaves. The wife
doesn't like it and moves on but the huband keeps ... |
0 |
252 |
10 |
4.78 |
3/18/2006 5:56 am |
|
|
Vibrating Husband
A mother was walking down the hall when she heard a humming
sound coming from her daughters bedroom. When she opened
the door she found her daughter naked on the bed with a vibrator.
... |
1 |
292 |
11 |
4.85 |
3/18/2006 5:53 am |
|
|
HAPPIEST DAY
Attending a wedding for the first time, a little girl whispered
to her mother, "Why is the bride dressed in white?"
"Because white is the color of happiness, and today
is the happiest day ... |
4 |
221 |
23 |
5.46 |
3/14/2006 12:11 am |
|
|
QUOTES FROM SPORTS PERSONALITIES
Chicago Cubs outfielder Andre Dawson on being a role model:
"I wan' all dem kids to do what I do, to look up to
me. I wan' all the kids to copulate me."
New Orleans Saint RB George Rogers ... |
0 |
38 |
6 |
4.22 |
3/14/2006 12:08 am |
|
|
MAYDAY! MAYDAY!
A blonde is on board a small two- seater plane when suddenly
the pilot dies. Not knowing how to fly a plane she grabs the
radio. "Mayday, Mayday! My pilot just died!"
she screams.
Ground ... |
0 |
52 |
6 |
5.36 |
3/14/2006 12:02 am |
|
|
WHO IS THE BOSS?
A retiring farmer was selling his land and getting rid of
his farm animals.
He went to every house in his town. At the houses where the
man was the boss, he gave them one of his horses. At ... |
0 |
55 |
7 |
4.82 |
3/13/2006 11:55 pm |
|
|
Has technology changed YOU?
1. If it's not microwavable, can you cook it?
2. When was the last time you played a card game with REAL
cards?
3. Have you ever talked with someone using Instant Messages
who was ... |
0 |
54 |
3 |
3.43 |
3/13/2006 1:05 am |
|
|
WHO IS WRONG?
A husband and wife were involved in a petty argument, both
of them unwilling to admit they might be in error.
"I'll admit I'm wrong, " the wife
told her husband in a conciliatory attempt, ... |
0 |
83 |
7 |
4.57 |
3/7/2006 9:05 pm |
|
|
AS DEAD
This guy was watching TV as his wife was out cutting the grass
during the hot summer. He finally worked up the energy and
went out to ask his wife what was for supper.
Well, his old lady ... |
0 |
89 |
6 |
3.08 |
3/7/2006 9:04 pm |
|
|
A BOGEY
The husband reluctantly agreed to play in the couples alternate
shot tournament at his club. He teed off on the first hole,
a par four, and blistered a drive 300 yards down the middle
of the ... |
0 |
53 |
6 |
4.50 |
3/7/2006 9:02 pm |
|
|
LAMENT
The grief-stricken man threw himself at the grave and cried
bitterly, "Oh how senseless is it! How worthless
this carcass about me, because you are gone. If only you
had lived, if only fate had ... |
0 |
39 |
6 |
4.22 |
3/7/2006 9:01 pm |
S2art, 43 M
3/7/2006 2:32 pm
1
Article,
Score
0.0
|
|
The Spanish Computer
The Spanish Computer
A Spanish teacher was explaining to her class that in Spanish,
unlike
English, nouns are designated as either masculine or feminine.
She
explained,
... |
0 |
38 |
5 |
1.84 |
3/7/2006 2:32 pm |
|
|
BAKED BEANS
A lady met a sweet gentleman and fell in love. When it became
apparent that they would marry, she made the supreme sacrifice
and gave up beans. Some months later, on her birthday, her
car broke ... |
0 |
59 |
9 |
4.71 |
3/5/2006 1:14 am |
|
|
BETTER HOUSEKEEPER
My friend's husband is always telling her that housekeeping
would be a snap if only she would organize her time better.
<br>
Recently he had a chance to put his theory into practice
while ... |
0 |
36 |
8 |
4.17 |
3/5/2006 12:49 am |
|
|
FACE
In the late 1700s, personal hygiene left much room for improvement.
As a result, many women and men had developed acne scars
by adulthood. The women would spread bee's wax over
their facial skin ... |
0 |
40 |
6 |
4.22 |
3/5/2006 12:46 am |
|
|
AREA 51
You've all heard of the Air Force's ultra-high-security,
super-secret base in Nevada, known simply as "Area
51?"
<br>
Well, late one afternoon, the Air Force folks out at Area
51 were ... |
0 |
127 |
12 |
5.80 |
3/2/2006 11:02 am |
|
|
GOLFING BUDDIES
Joe: "Why don't you play golf with Bob any more?"
<br>
Mike: "Would you play with someone who curses after
each shot, cheats in the bunkers, makes noise while you
putt and enters false ... |
0 |
106 |
5 |
4.45 |
3/2/2006 11:00 am |
|
|
WHAT DAY IS IT?
Over breakfast one morning, a woman said to her husband,
"I bet you don't know what day this is."
<br>
"Of course I do, " he indignantly answered,
getting up from the table and going out ... |
0 |
103 |
6 |
5.07 |
3/2/2006 10:59 am |
|
|
TRAIN ANNOUNCEMENTS
Enjoy this list of actual announcements that London tube
train drivers have made to their passengers:
<br>
(a) "Ladies and Gentlemen, I do apologize for the
delay to your service. I know ... |
0 |
88 |
3 |
3.92 |
3/1/2006 10:28 am |
|
|
BARREN
BARREN
<br>
A man and a woman had been married for ten years and decided
to try and have kids. They had not been using birth control
for the entire time they had been married, so they ... |
0 |
117 |
5 |
3.80 |
3/1/2006 10:18 am |
|
|
CROSSING THE RED SEA
CROSSING THE RED SEA
<br>
Ten year old Mikey, was asked by his mother what he had learned
in Vacation Bible School.
<br>
"Well, Mommy, our teacher told us how God sent Moses ... |
0 |
97 |
4 |
4.41 |
3/1/2006 10:15 am |
|
|
Hi
HE: I'm a photographer I've been looking
for a face like yours!
> SHE: I'm a plastic surgeon. I've been looking
for a face like yours!!
> > HE: May I have the pleasure of this ... |
0 |
133 |
4 |
3.25 |
2/27/2006 3:06 pm |
|
|
VP dick Cheney considered for Medal of Freedom
Subject: Medal of Freedom candidate
<br>
WASHINGTON, D.C. - A white house source stated that Congress
is considering awarding Vice-President dick Cheney the
Medal of Freedom, the ... |
0 |
121 |
3 |
4.90 |
2/26/2006 10:04 am |
|
|
CAUGHT IN THE ACT
CAUGHT IN THE ACT
<br>
The Lord of the manor returned from his grouse hunt quite
a bit earlier than expected. He entered the master bedroom
to change, and found her Ladyship making ... |
1 |
218 |
9 |
3.21 |
2/25/2006 9:13 pm |
|
|
APPEARING AND DISAPPEARING
APPEARING AND DISAPPEARING
<br>
There is a knock on St. Peter's door. He looks out and
a man is standing there. St. Peter is about to begin his interview
when the man disappears.
... |
0 |
124 |
3 |
3.92 |
2/25/2006 9:10 pm |
|
|
WORST PLAYER
WORST PLAYER
<br>
One day, John Smith decided to go to a new golf course where
no one knew him, just to get away and see if he could do better
elsewhere.
<br>
He hired a caddy ... |
0 |
97 |
2 |
3.81 |
2/25/2006 9:08 pm |
elisa1, 29 F
2/25/2006 11:24 am
7
Articles,
Score
0.0
|
|
When is being comfortable, too comfortable?
As a woman, if I am with my boyfriend, when during the course
of the relationship is it alright to become COMFORTABLE
in the relationship, and is it being too comfortable? Personally,
I don't ... |
1 |
250 |
10 |
2.59 |
2/25/2006 11:24 am |
|
|
jocelyn
what might you doif you found your husband/wife cheating
on ... |
0 |
153 |
2 |
3.12 |
2/23/2006 2:41 pm |
|
|
10 Of The World's Worst Pick-Up Lines
Your eyes meet across a crowded room... the atmosphere
is charged with desire... you approach, cool and composed...
and knock 'em dead with a line like...
<br>
1. Can I buy you a drink, ... |
1 |
231 |
7 |
3.30 |
2/21/2006 6:37 pm |
|
|
MUST READ Extremely Lame Pick Up Lines
1. The word of the day is "legs." Let's go
back to my place and spread the word.
<br>
2. That outfit would look great in a crumpled heap on my bedroom
floor tomorrow morning.
<br> ... |
1 |
219 |
7 |
3.04 |
2/21/2006 6:32 pm |
|
|
MUST READ = Comeback Lines 2 Pick Up Lines
1. Haven't I seen you someplace before?
Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.
<br>
2. Is this seat empty?
Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.
<br>
3. Your place or ... |
0 |
240 |
7 |
6.10 |
2/21/2006 6:27 pm |
|
|
MONGOOSES
MONGOOSES
<br>
The manager of a large city zoo was drafting a letter to order
a pair of animals. He sat at his computer and typed the following
sentence: "I would like to place an order ... |
0 |
72 |
1 |
2.40 |
2/17/2006 8:07 am |
|
|
THE ROBOT BARTENDER
A man enters a bar and discovers the bartender is a robot.
<br>
The robot serves him a perfectly prepared cocktail and
then asks him, "What's your IQ?"
<br>
The man replies "150" ... |
0 |
102 |
5 |
4.45 |
2/16/2006 6:55 am |
|
|
The Husband Store in NY
A store that sells husbands has just opened in New York City,
where a woman may go to choose a husband.
<br>
Among the instructions at the entrance is a description
of how the store ... |
0 |
101 |
3 |
5.39 |
2/16/2006 6:53 am |
|
|
The FLU
Miss Beatrice, the church organist, was in her eighties.
She was admired for her sweetness and kindness to all. One
afternoon the pastor came to call on her and she showed him
into her quaint ... |
0 |
69 |
2 |
4.50 |
2/14/2006 9:18 pm |
|
|
Ladies Night Out!
The other night , a few friends of mine went out to this "Lady's
Club." One of the women wanted to impress us. So, she
pulled out a $10 bill.
<br>
The male dancer came over to us, and my ... |
4 |
143 |
8 |
4.17 |
2/8/2006 12:03 pm |
